ATHAR MUDASIR
Sunday, 15 September 2024
Oh blessed one: A Prophet's Journey
Tuesday, 3 September 2024
The Perils of Overconfidence: From Excitement to Delusion and Myth
Tuesday, 25 June 2024
The Vicious Grip of Drug Abuse.
Wednesday, 13 March 2024
On the scales
On the scales of duties and obligations,
Jonah ran from the town,
Thinking being upright, he ran out of sight,
To levy wrath on the town.
On the scales of criterion, right and wrong.
The ship got stuck in the High 🌊 tide.
On the ⚖️ scales of reason and logic of men,
Jonah is the one,
Who is been sacrificed to save the boat ⛵🌊.
Thrown in the raging sea,
He is panting and struggling between the sea.
The bubbles are engulfing him,
Suddenly the dark curtains rose all-around like walls.
Looking towards the sky,
The blue 🔵 sky went 🌑 black.
Thee slipped deep inside the fish 🐋.
In the depths of sea and fish.
He listened to the sounds of fish.
Where he realized,
Being a prophet, why was he abandoned?
Doing his duty,
He questioned Why?
This is the difference between a commoner and prophet.
He listened to the cries of great fish.
The praise they send in the darkest oceans.
Where he realized the darkness of his heart, fish and sea.
He knew why!
He knew, he flew!
Sunday, 9 January 2022
SHEEN MOHNU; THE GHOST OF WILDERNESS/ a novella by Athar Mudasir
Sheen Mohnu
“The Ghost of Wilderness”
Athar Mudasir
THE CONTENT IS INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY RIGHT OF MR. ATHAR MUDASIR AND ALL RIGHTS ARE RESERVED AND PRESERVED,
NO PART OF THIS PUBLICATION MAY BE REPRODUCED IN ANY FORM OR BY ANY MEANS WITHOUT PRIOR PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR AND PUBLICATION.
THE WORK IS PURELY FICTION AND ALL THE CHARACTERS AND INCIDENTS ARE CREATED DRAMATICALLY TO FORM A SCENE AND SUIT THE STORY.
ISBN NUMBER; 9781791357030
First published in 2018
Edition and revision published on 2019
SHEEN MOHNU
The Ghost of Wilderness
Athar Mudasir
‘So relate the Stories, perhaps they may reflect’
Al-Araf (7:176)
By Athar Mudasir
In childhood, we have been fascinated with the folk tales and these primitive imaginations induce a deep psychological and pre-mature development and impact on an individual’s and societies behaviour as a whole, we have been listening to the stories from grandparents about the snowman who roams in the dark snow lands. It snatches the child who is roaming alone in the dark hours of winter. It might look horrible but for the children's it was more curious and adventurous, as they always build it in a very chilling wave of cold. The art of making the snowman with such dedication and realizing it will melt down by night. Most children imagined to get it alive. Our childhood was fashioned with such stories and made a keen bind with our grandparents. The modern world has just got irrespectively isolated; the children no more receive the glimpse of such tales from their grandparents. The object of the story is to represent the nature, art, culture and social attributions in modern Kashmir to the world. The story is fictional and is crafted to suit the social framework of Valley with allegory and metaphors. The story revolves around a poor nomad teenager who gets lost and despairs in the far city and gets stuck within social, political and economical isolation and strives to reach home through harsh conditions.
‘The book is dedicated to my Mommy and Abu’
Index
Haruud haa aaw (autumn has come)
Wandee tchav (winter has come)
Pheran (a long garment)
Kuney zuun (left alone)
Roomut bay darbeedar (despair and lost)
Kahwa at shrine (the tea at shrine)
Shikara (a small boat)
Ghare shu gasun (going home).
Haruud haa aaw
(Autumn has come)
Sheen Mohnu (The Snow Man)
Haruud haa aaw (autumn has come)
The Glimmer of Sun striking the mountains, villages, forest, farms, houses; embracing them with the blessing of a new day. The shallow gorge where river rush as horses are in the race, Birds are yet to come out. The roaster is calling the people of a village to come out from warmth and pleasures of illusion and rush for the day with hard work and smile. In these mountains, is the beautiful place called ‘Pahalgam’ it is covered with mesmerizing beautiful landscapes, here nomads gather living peacefully with harmony. They mostly are busy in cattle grazing, wood cutting, and cultivating maize. The people are working hard to collect their bounties and save for harsh rainy days. Their lives ''Yousuf'' a 16 years Boy who is the lone bread earner of his family with his mother; 'Ruhi' and sister; 'Zainab'.
The family responsibilities fall on his weak shoulders at the age of seven, the horrifying events are yet nightmare for him. He remembers when his father was taken by some men, trashing, beating, they put him in the van and ramped the lawn and never returned again. His mother hasn't smiled since. He often questioned and inquired to mother about his father's disappearance but she could never answer and remained silent often and instead scolded him. The boy is been raised with extreme poverty since he is engulfed with the family responsibilities, taming cattle, and farming in summer. He still hopes that one day his father will return, but every night veils itself in vanity and tears fall in hope. They are poor people with little desires of having two meals a day and wood for warming bodies. Their home is located at the higher edge of the lower mountain range and every day he has to get down the cliff and bring water from the river.
Ruhi is a very modest and beautiful woman and has raised his children with sympathy and gratitude, taught them good manners and have admitted them into village school. She hopes they will one day become a prominent officer and change their destiny of poverty and develop their village. Zainab is elder to Yousuf and looks like her mother. She is good at studies and had taken a scholarship for studying in the college in Anantnag a town about 50 kilometers from pahalgham. She resides in a hostel over there and visits someday to her home. The life in the city had changed her clothing nature and affected her behaviour. She has fallen in love with the city boy and dates her often. Her lover has given her a mobile phone which she hides from her family. She had been fed up with the harsh and narrow life of the village; she feels so and wants to marry the boy she likes. She keeps it secret about her affair from her mother, she is afraid that her mother will banish her studies and will scold her, when she will come to know about her affair in town.
The village is far from the main market of the area and has no official route or road. It is covered with thick forest and has no electricity and water facilities. The village is part of the most prominent tourist spot but its location doesn’t seem to attract people, which had made it invisible in eyes of government and public. But these hardships don’t seem to make life impossible but these villagers have managed from hundreds of years and lit the kindle of life in the far-flung area. Villagers live with great affection, as the whole village lives in scarce resources and generally, they provide some help to each other. Either it is a portion of good food or any equipment. The tranquility is pondered in the village.
But their family is terrified by the behaviour of the landlord, Khan Sabh, The crooked ugly man with a large moustache, flat back, big eyebrows and eyes look like as viper hiding in a bush. He always carries a long stick and no one in the village might be who wasn't thrashed and beaten by him. He lives in one of the biggest house in the village and is the owner of a hotel down in the market. He pretends villagers that he is their protector and guardian, he provides certain facilities to villagers, He lends money to them and charges interests and later occupies their lands or makes them work for free. He claims that Yousuf's father has also borrowed money from him. He mostly visits their home uninvited and insists with harsh words to make them pay the money, and warns them, he will occupy their land and house. Ruhi always assures him to pay; with words and looking to her empty wallet, she desires for the miracle to set off the debt. Ruhi did not have any other source for money; they make their bounties by farming and sheep rearing. But that could only make the provisions for food and clothes. The rooftop of the house is cracked and the water lodges from that, she had talked to a carpenter who said it needs to be redeemed wholly and could break any time. It costs in thousands; she can’t afford to make it and fears about approaching winter.
‘The snow will break the roof this winter’.
There are many youngsters in the area but among them is his best friend ''Yamin'', who is by height and nature similar to Yousuf and lives just the next door. His family had appreciable assistance for Yousuf's family after his father's disappearance. They both were raised together and studied in the same class and school. Yamin is very curious about playing and exploring new things within his vicinity. They collected many stones and gems and stored them in the terrace of his home. There he plays with the pigeons and many of them take shelter under their roof. They had to go regularly to school and if anyone misses the day has to face the wrath of the ‘Gul kak’ the headmaster. He always endeavours to make students realize the importance of education in one's life. But, students always nock their heads as they understand everything, but hardly any inspiration pierces their heart. It’s not the emptiness of their teacher speech but hollowness of system which can’t represent and provide better facilities before students and they could see their future. But recently a backward boy has put the River ladder on fire, which now waves in the hearts of mountains and many students are inspired by the bureaucrat who belongs to one of the areas and qualified the service selection. Gul kak is often sinking in deep thoughts of raising his community his perception is to change the fate of people by education.
Many aspirants want to become the bureaucrat but the comprehensive syllabus and its procedure seems touching the moon. A boy and girl living in such conditions that have to fight and struggle for water bucket, which gets half drained till he reaches his village can’t make it of his own. Gul kak lives far from the village but he attends the school daily and compels all teachers and students to be punctual and diligent. His presence is important for the school to operate but he is been hated by both teachers and students. Teachers desire for his transfer.
The harsh behaviour of teachers and rudeness compels Yousuf not to attend the school, he and Yousuf often bunks the class, but his mother beat him and takes him back to school. The school complex is not more than a stable, though many teachers are appointed for the job without proper building and basic facilities. The teachers are often beating unnecessarily and make them work. In the school all the village children are admitted, there is no option without this school. The morning prayers in the school start at 9 'o' clock and all the students assemble and shout louder, praying, singing, and hailing the religious and national allegories. The harvesting and cattle rearing along with school is overburden for the little guy. He cries in the meadows and misses his father and returns home curtaining the depression with a smile :) on his face. The homework of mathematics and social science is the riddle and invincible for him. He endeavours his best to understand but mathematics need practices and he doesn’t have rough and pencil for that. The stones in the gorge have become the paper and charcoal as a pencil for these students. It’s their board exams this year, so his mother tries her best to make him study hard when he returns home. In these villages darkness veils before cities as they don’t have electricity and had to sleep after sunset. Yousuf hates books more than Khan Sabh.
The province is one of most visited tourist and religious place in the valley and hundred thousands of people visit here every year. The people of mountains live peacefully and get an extra earning hand in the summer season. Most of the local men do various works and sell different commodities to visitors. Yousuf’s family lives quite far from the main market and have no good route, the road is destroyed years before and no one takes any heed to retain its maintenance. Ruhi does not allow Yousuf to go for work in the market; she is afraid and anxious, as any mishap might occur to him. He owns a small pony, he goes down into the market whenever he gets chance with his friends and enjoy with tourists and make friends. They keep watching people and offer some to take a ride on the pony and earn some bucks which he doesn’t reveal to his mother but usually gets some stuff to home. His mother questions about it and he replies he earned first then only spent. Ruhi knew the money in teenage can divert his attention from studies and make him forever labour and get exploited in hands of Khan like men. They have to work secretly as the pony association doesn’t let them work without being registered. The boys from cities come here in their fancy cars, with loud music, coloured hair and dancing appetite; rush into the market, villages and encroach the social independence of indigenous people.
Yousuf sat on a big stone hanging in the gorge and looks as it will roll at any time into it, but the trees have hold it with their roots trying to save the village. He gets enacted with nature and people and sinks deep into the thoughts, he thinks; the visitors not only bring money with them to spend here but they bring their culture and traditions; which are different to us as villagers. We also Endeavour our level best to compare and look alike them. But every time they come with new attire and leave us behind. Plastic bottles come floating the river he criticizes; it is the waste which they leave while leaving their home, are they seeking mountains to make them dirty as they have made their towns and cities. Though he has not visited any town and village of state so far but assumes that how they would be like. But is convinced also about ‘It can’t be changed now, it is now part of our society and has to be accepted with generosity and prepare and manage to make things better and fruitful for all’. If all these people disappear our lives will become meaningless and we can’t touch the world then. His friends called him; he flushed out from his thoughts.
He looks across the river where a stranger is staring on him. He feels awkward as he has been seeing him from many years now. He follows him in woods but never comes near him.
-‘hay who are you and why are you following me’.
The stranger keeps staring him and behind Yousuf yamin comes to him –‘whom you are shouting’. Yousuf looks towards yamin and answers ‘that person across the river’.
-‘but whom there isn’t anyone’. Yousuf is looking all around but the stranger is nowhere. –‘there was someone’ murmurs Yousuf.
-‘okay it is fine bro, let us go now’.
It is Sunday so Yousuf and his friends have come in the market to entertain themselves and the tourists, they found some guys who look partying carrying many things to eat and also have a small tent. They are excited to see them and went to meet and greet them.
‘Asalamu-alikum brother; said the Yousuf to tourists
‘Waliakumsalam’ replied one of them
‘Do you wish to have a ride on pony’ said the Yousuf
‘Nah man, we don’t need, but yes, if you will help us’
‘What kind of help’ said the Yousuf?
‘Can you arrange some weed for us’ said the tourist?
‘What’s that’ Yousuf said in a wondering.
‘laughing loud; you don’t know. Don’t lie’; tourist replied
Yousuf left them unanswered, but questioning Yamin ‘what is that thing they want.
‘That is a very dangerous thing and not a good one’ Yamin replied.
But one of the companions of Yousuf agreed to get them. Some villager’s compromise as their livelihood depends on tourism they do such acts to earn more money. Yousuf said to his friend that we are not obliged to transgress our character for money. But the greed of some bucks curtailed his vision. Yousuf tried to stop him but he was not going to listen. He has been doing it from his childhood. Yousuf was new to this; he understands that these elements destroy the society. He sat on his pony and left them. He decided to get some job as part-time. He attended many hotels and found all the hotels are owned by outsiders and generally give employment to their own people, to get some work over there, but was refused by them and reply was mostly general that they don’t trust the indigenous. Yousuf’s heart got filled with despair ink. He replied to the hotel manager ‘why you don’t trust us, you are living in our place and you don’t trust us, it’s painful and ruthless’. The cheerful mood of Yousuf had been ruined and wants to go home and decided not to waste time in the market. While moving to home on his pony he saw his classmate and stopped.
‘Hay brother how are you and what are you doing here’, he replied that he has let his house for tourists and provide catering service also. He was surprised and never thought that it is possible to do so. He kept moving towards home. The indigenous people make their own Endeavour to let rooms and provide logistic services to tourists at small scale is a good idea to collect a bucket of water in rain, Yousuf family lives far and have no considerable place for tourists. He is searching for any idea that will make him plan his future. He complains his mother ‘why we are poor and my life is ruined’. Her mother tries to make him understand that it’s not us that ruined you life but the destiny and after you complete your teenage your destiny belongs to you and more you work hard more you will earn, so concentrate on studies and become a gentle man.’I don’t understand how studies will make me a gentle man’. She replies ‘when you possess knowledge you become visionary and then you possess the capacity to look for ways, which will make you a better human’. –‘mom I hate studies, I don’t want to study’.
-‘what, I don’t want to listen any excuse in this matter, whether you like or not you have to qualify exam’. Yousuf stands and go to another room and open the window and looks towards the mountains. He wishes he could climb it and make snow man on it.
The trees have shed their leaves, people and tourists have minimized and market had become ghostly. All the villagers are busy in reaping their bounty. They collected the maize and grinded and stored them, Yamin and Yousuf go hand to hand help each other and make work easier and faster.
Yousuf is collecting the maize and he stands up and sees again the stranger staring him. A man with black clothes broad shoulders, but his face seem faded and is not visible to memorize. He gets frightened and found him alone in land. He moves slowly back and runs abruptly. The stranger is yet staring him till he covers the place and comes far from there. He is panting and yamin sees him distressed and comes near to him.
-‘Yousuf’.
Yousuf shouts, ‘what happen’ replies yamin. –‘I saw the ghost, I was alone and he came to me’.
-‘what are you saying, ghost, they don’t exist’.
-‘by God I saw him he follows me often’.
-‘what are you saying he follows then you are in danger, let’s go back to home’.
-‘but my tools are in tilth, I can’t leave them behind, if anyone will take them, my mother will kill me’.
-‘okay but who will go their’.
-‘you will come with me’.
-‘no I am not going to come, I am scared’.
-‘please come with me’.
-‘okay calm’.
Yamin speaks ‘bro if I will tell you news that will blow you’.
-‘what is that now’.
-‘exams are scheduled’ replies Yamin.
Yousuf becomes gloomy he gets more distressed ‘how we will mange in such a short time’.
They both went to place to collect the agriculture tools which he had left behind. He is glaring all-around to detect any trace of the ghost. He picks his tools and rush back along with yamin.
The work was yet incomplete, the board exams have been scheduled and started, they study in 10th grade whose exam is conducted by the Board of school Education. They nowadays study together and share their understanding. They have completed major syllabus and someone had given them guess papers. These papers were not less than miracle for them and can give them necessary hedge to qualify with minimum marks. They are happy with that; they don’t bother about competitiveness as their farsightedness is seemed within their vicinity. They are unaware of ruthless and brutal competition outside the village.
The exam is been conducted in the market school where many schools have been sync for exam.
-‘Yousuf my dear son, please study little more, they are very precious moments and then you are free to enjoy after exams’.
-‘mom I studying, I can’t do more than it’.
On the day of exams he is sleeping and his mother open the gate abruptly and wakes him to do revision. He wants to sleep ‘mom only for 5 minutes’. She leaves and comes again after some minutes and found him sleeping. She wakes him and removes the blanket. He has to wakeup now, he gets prepared and leaves home.
They have gathered with friends and talking about topics of paper. They even learn some questions in the school; they have been praying to all Mighty from morning that their paper gets good. He is talking with yamin and his eyes were stuck with the glimpse of a beautiful girl mesmerized him. He is fascinated with her beauty and keeps looking her; the questions and answers have all faded in beauty of a girl. Other boys are also staring her and among one said ‘I am flat and I will propose her today’. He is listening and wants to act but what can he act and for what. He said him ‘he has fallen for her and he wants her’. They started teasing each other, yamin said my dear you are fighting for the person who even don’t know both of you and first concentrate on today’s paper, and she will reject both of you. Yousuf neglected his taunt and is impressed with her. He gets continuous glimpse, when she entered the school, pretty face, and some hair coming down and she continuously put them behind her ear.
He want to know her name, they went in the class to give their paper and sat randomly. The teachers attended and said take your roll number slips and sit as according to prescribed seat. He has even gone to sit near in her class where she sits. He was taken out when his roll number slip didn’t match the class roll. The teacher said are you illiterate that you can’t see the list and came inside. He is looking downwards and she is seeing him and laughing within. He got out from that class and went into his class. Yamin said where you were. He smiled and said I was in her class. Yamin laughed and said you are out of your mind.
He wrote his paper quickly and is waiting outside, yamin takes always full time to write answers in exam, he is in hurry and excited. She came out with cheerful smile. He met her and said how the paper was. She is seeing him strangely and said you are that guy who was wrongly sitting in our class. He said yes and smiled. She moved and left the premises. He is walking behind her and seeing her. Suddenly a biker stopped and she went with him. He is looking and thinking who will be this guy. Yamin came from behind ‘why you left early and did you do any question in the paper’. He said ‘I did well but I am worried who was that person with whom she left’. They are walking towards their home back. Discussing the paper and checking whether they had attempted rightly. Next paper is after couple of days and is good time to revise and study. They are working with hair to toe and managed to cover the syllabus under limited questions.
It’s the next paper he went early to school even left yamin behind, he went to his home and calls him, but Yousuf mother came out and said he left early and did he not went with you today. ‘What has happen to him’? Yamin also left and went towards school. Yousuf is waiting at complex and he saw her coming on the same bike. She entered into school and joined her friends. He had decided to know her name anyway. He went into his class again today and is trying to see her roll number where he could see her name. But the teacher came inside, he saw him and he ran away from the class. The teacher said is he the same guy whom I previously took out; students replied ‘yes sir’. He is waiting for paper eagerly and yamin called him, what are you doing, why didn’t you called me while leaving home’. Yousuf said I am sorry I was waiting for her; he laughed on him. He again wrote his paper before time and is waiting for her, yamin also came out and both are at the gate. There she approached and he came in front of her and said; hello can I know your name. She said ‘No, you can’t’, and she left with attitude. He feels down and humiliated before other guys and they were laughing at him. He and yamin is walking with gloom and faded faces and reached home. His mother found him sad and came near to him. She said have you done good paper or not and don’t worry. He said ‘mooji’ I did well and I am not worried about that. Than what is worrying you said Ruhi. He didn’t answer back and ate his food and went to sleep.
Yamin came to his home and said now we have mathematics and what shall we do, they collected all their rough works and books and started practicing some chapters of Algebra, linear equation, quadratic equation, trigonometry and geometry others they left. He said yamin to do anything and get her name. He is terrified with math’s and said will see after exam. They are practicing continuously and even their pens had dried. On the day of exam they went together as he was displeased by her attitude. He didn’t wait for her today but sat somewhere he is unapproachable. Yamin came to him said her name is ‘Zooni’. He got quite happy but remained silent and instead said let’s go to class. She is looking here and there and said to her friends ‘thank God he has disappeared today’. It’s the paper time and started doing questions, the paper is very tough and he has even forgotten the trigonometry formula and lost 15 marks from that question, he is counting probable marks but seems he won’t make them. Anyhow he assures himself that he would get1/3rd marks of paper. He is gloomed and walking, she approached before him and said how the paper was, he is staged and replied ‘all well’ she said it was very tough and I have secured only 80% of paper. He is looking as crow comparing himself with her. He thought he is failed, she said okay bye my brother has came to take me. He said is he your bother, she said yes. She left and this gave him really pampering intuitions. He is now rejoicing that he now knew her name and she talked to him. Yamin came with tears in his eyes as he suffered disaster in paper. Their results are uncertain as they themselves are unaware of their performance. Yamin is worried that his father will get very angry for his bad paper. Yousuf is today blooming and roses have burst in his heart.
It’s now the social studies paper; Yousuf is good at this subject and thinks he can write it in his own words. He did the paper quite well and is waiting for her, she also came and he said ‘hello’ she replied hello, how are you. I am good replied Yousuf. She said what your name is, he said I am Yousuf and what your name is, she replied ‘zooni’; though he knew her name but listening from her is wonderful and she said my brother will arrive at any time so I shall leave and good bye. He is blissful and filled with rejoice. She is adorable and beautiful, he has lost in her, and she took him from his sense and lost his concentration. He seems to be interested in her more than giving exams. His mother tells him how papers are going my dear, he replies ‘awesome’; this makes her smile as breaking the snow. Exams have ended and she had faded, he wasn’t able to met her at last paper, she had left before him as he is not good in English paper, so it took him much time as compare others. This made Yousuf to lose in despair and daily visits the market to trace her location. Autumn has ended and winter has approached. The village and heart of Yousuf feels same; lost and despair by the winter of season and emotions.
Zainab has also returned from the hostel for winter vacations but her heart and mind seems left in the town. Her mother noticed serious change in her behavior and has no attention in home affairs. Her mother tried to negotiate with her but she is afraid to talk regarding her affection with the city boy. She studies in the Anantnag town, where she met the ‘Aquib’ who also studies in same class. Her mother is anxious for her marriage, she doesn’t know how to marry her and pay dowry. Their village doesn’t have mobile services so she tries to get in the market by one cause or other, so that she could talk with her beloved. The affairs are treated as anti-social element in whole of state, so if anyone found openly having relationship can become nightmare for them.
Soon after exams Yousuf and yamin has to finish their incomplete work left due to exam. They are working for whole day and collecting their bounties and stuff to mend their piety. He is missing and lost in memories of Zooni. But the work of home is compulsory even he is desolated, even though he has to rush for work. All the village men have started collecting wood for winter. The trees which have been naturally plucked are been cut and distributed by villagers. Some greedy men cut the good ones also. They are seeing him and yamin’s father tried to interfere but their dark words is dark as their intentions. One among the elders said; don’t you understand the forest is our home and if we cut trees randomly, it will become barren; all barren and devastated then we all will be scare for a grain. But the outrageous men don’t stop on pleading of humble men. These boys learnt a good moral lesson today and faced social evils also. They have collected many quintals of wood and take it on the back of his pony. His pony has also become weak and old now. The government officials have noticed them to surrender their pony and will compensate with some money. It’s hard for them; it is as their family member and has been serving their family from many years. It belonged to Yousuf’s father; he had enjoyed his life on it. Now this veteran is on the edge of collapse. They take good care of him and provide him efficient fodder. The trees cut for smuggling has made the area under vigilance of forest department and its effect has now caused problem to innocent villagers and yousuf’s family. This is the reason they are been noticed to surrender pony, as officials presume that wood logs are been carried by these ponies of villagers by the smugglers.
***
Wandee tchav
(winter has come)
Wandee tchav (winter has come)
The winter had approached and cold had chilled the whole region. The mountains look like desert and ghostly silent. Though for a couple of months coldness has been chilling but since yesterday it feels more bitter and shivering, the water in the bucket has got chilled. Schools have been closed with the announcement of winter vacations. The down market has been isolated in the season. A person fears while walking in a day, the windows of big hotels are shrouded with silence and someone looks staring through those windows. Walking in the lonely roads the scent of fear is felt. The imperceptible fear of the ''Haput' black bear clocks all the way, who hides in the caves during winter.
All high steeps they used to run and play with cattle, raging in battle, striving for families are desolated and silent. He is riding his pony and moving towards home. The cold breezes have caused him headache, he wants to reach home quickly. The road seems stretching and his village far. In the woods his eyes got stocked on the man hiding behind the bug rebut his attire seems visible. Yousuf is shocked it is the same ghost who is following him. He pushes the pony and rushed towards his village. He is panting and looking behind. He finally reaches his village.
He went to his house and slept; tying his mothers scarf. Ruhi brought blanket for him and suggested to sleep properly. Yamin is on door and Ruhi told him he is sick and sleeping; go be with him. He is sitting near him and talking to his mother, she is preparing ‘kahwa’ for them. Yousuf is unable to sleep and is talking with them and taking sip of ‘Kahwa’. He feels better; but his mother told him to be at home today and not to roam unnecessarily.
-‘yamin the ghost was following me again’.
-‘really, where and when’.
-‘when I was coming back to home he was staring on me with his dark eyes, I was shocked, it felt he is scratching my soul and hypnotizing me, I somehow managed to escape’.
-‘why don’t you tell to your mother’.
-‘no way bro, she will get panic and will cage me at home’.
Yamin laughs –‘but you have to do something to this problem; otherwise it may create serious injury to you in future’.
Ruhi is listening their conversation and goes to them ‘what are you saying my kids, what ghost and who saw him’.
-‘mom I saw him’.
-‘yes aunty he has been haunted by him since many days’ speaks yamin to Ruhi in excitement.
-‘now what shall I do’ replies Ruhi in worry and trembling.
-‘yamin I said you don’t tell her’ replies Yousuf on looking her mother’s anxiousness.
-‘I will take you to Peer Subh tomorrow’ replies Ruhi.
Yousuf stands up and speaks ‘you guys won’t let ne nap, let’s go yamin’. They left the place and went to play outside with headache in Yousuf.
Ruhi calls him come early today, otherwise you will get severe headache later.
Women of her village came inside to take some sugar from her and in between said to Ruhi that she was in market today and I saw Zainab with some guy, who seems outsider. They were wondering in the park and even taking pictures. She got stuck to hear this and is worried what she shall do. –‘Are you sure you saw her’ replied Ruhi. Yes definitely I recognized her replied the women. The women left her house and she is waiting for her with anger. Zainab came home singing in low tune; just wait Zainab, can you say me where were you today and with whom. Zainab is silent and ran, but Ruhi caught her as leopard catches dear. Tell me what are you doing and don’t you have sense, don’t you see the position of family. Don’t you care about us? These boys will exploit you and leave. No he not among them replies Zainab. Ruhi slapped her and said this is what you are learning in town. We don’t need your education if you want to do such activities. Zainab is curtailed with compassion and can’t understand the advice of her mother. Zainab went into room and is crying behind closed walls and door.
It’s now night and Yousuf came to home and found his mother very angry in a dark room which is lighted with a small candle burning with a radiant flame shining their small room and walls. She scolded him on being late and said; you both don’t listen to me and only create problem to me. Yousuf showed politeness and hugged his mother and said I love you ‘mooji’ and I promise I will always abide with your saying. She smiled and said eat food and call your sister also to take her food before candle vanishes. He is unaware of any matter and went to her room. Knocking and calling her. She came out with gloomy face and took her dinner and went back to room. Ruhi told him to keep eye on her, you are so irresponsible and only lost in your childhood; now you have grown. He said okay and went to sleep. Zainab hides her phone on roof, which has some shelf. A small space on rooftop where anything can be kept.
Ruhi sleeps with her daughter in one room. In night Zainab woke up she feels wet on her blanket, she is trying to find the match box; she is trembling and found it. She lit the stick and looked towards her mother she found blood on her face. She woke her and said what had happen mooji. She said what I don’t know. She brought a candle from kitchen and bowl of water. She is cleansing her face, Yousuf heard voices and he also woke up. He came in their room and saw her mother bleeding from her nostrils. He is terrified by seeing his mother in such condition. It is very dark night and coldness is so harsh that it’s hard to move. He went to the lone chemist’s house and calls him. it is very cold and frosty He is shouting I am Yousuf, please open the door. The chemist didn’t open the door; he thought it is a monster roaming outside. As the village is haunted with fables of Demons and Monsters, the door remained closed.
Yousuf went back home and told Zainab that we shall go to hospital in the market. What did the chemist said spoke Zainab, he didn’t open the door replied Yousuf. They took her mother out and closed the door and put her on the pony, all of them are on the back of pony. They are riding downwards and have taken fire torch along with them. The night is horrifying and every time they felt they are been watched and followed. The care of their mother storm there fear and kept moving.
Yousuf is looking around, he is fearful that the ghost may attack them. The pony is too old now; he is overburdened with their weight, but despite he is walking through the cold.
They reached the hospital and admitted her. The doctor is sleeping and not opening the door. He went to nurse she was also sleeping in her room. But Yousuf knocked her continuously which made her to come out. She came in fierce mood and shouts what is matter have you lost. She saw their mother and blood on her clothes and face. She checked her blood pressure and found high blood pressure and put injection to her. After sometime she felt better and her BP is now normal. But they can’t go home back tonight. Yousuf is worried about his pony and where he will keep him for night. It is too dangerous for him to left in open sky between the cold and dark. The hospital is empty and no one was admitted here tonight. He brought it also inside and kept it in the causality room which was empty. They slept over there in causality ward in intensive cold. –‘Yousuf have you lost, if anyone will find us here with a pony we will be ousted’.
-‘I don’t care; I can’t let him die in cold’.
Early in the morning he took it outside without letting anyone know about its presence in the hospital and decides to leave the hospital before someone sees them. They all have felt sick and took medicine for treating cold. Night was very cold which has crumpled their bodies and became prone to cold and fever. Yousuf is having severe headache.
They left towards their village. The cold wave crunches their foot step and they camped near the river and lit some fire and are warming themselves. They reached their home Yamin’s parents were waiting near their door. They saw them and ran towards -‘what had happened and where you had been’.
–‘We had gone to hospital late night to treat our mother said Yousuf.
-‘Why you didn’t approached chemist first’ said Yamin’s father.
-‘We went to him but he didn’t open the door’ said Yousuf.
-‘He is a coward’ said Yamin’s father. Then they went inside and kept Ruhi on mattress. Zainab is terrified and thinks that it’s due to her, that my mother got high blood pressure and was going to die’. Yousuf went into kitchen and started to make kahwa for her mother. Ruhi is lying on mattress and thinking and wondering in thoughts. She is tough women and had fought her life with iron claws. She recovered and now seems in good state. She went into kitchen to light the fire but Zainab told her that she will make it herself and directed her to rest. Zainab sits beside her mother and says ‘I am sorry and if anything would have happen to you, what we will do, don’t leave us alone’ and cries indiscriminately.
-‘my child don’t cry, come near me, you are princess, I am just worried about you’.
On the night when darkness veiled the land, feather light snow felt immensely and raising high, covering all the land, houses, hotels, markets and villages. The luster and sparkles of Snow blooming the soul of Yousuf while makes Ruhi very gloom and bothered about the roof which is on brink of collapse and essential stuff for the season. Yousuf woke up early in the morning and ran outside, shouts; calling for Yamin to come out and play with snow. They decided to raise the Snowman. The chilling cold and burning hands, with red cheeks and cracks on their face, won't stop them; they collected snow with the bucket and giving it a shape. Yamin got charcoal pieces from the kangri which his younger brother was holding; sitting on a log of wood watching them, Yousuf put his cap and muffler on and over the snowman. They have built a snowman which is taller than them, Zainab shouts; Yousuf come inside to take ''kahwa'' and bring Yamin along. Both, of them, went inside looking backwards towards snowman as it had yet to give a final touch. While taking Kahwa, Yousuf said to his mother to give something to eat with it, my stomach has burned with this boiled water. –‘Take some ‘soot’ along with it’ replies Ruhi. He went into kitchen and brought it, it is in the box whose lid he can’t open; as his hands are burning due to ice and it fall down. Ruhi shouts you are useless and doesn’t do any work properly. They collected it and put it back in the box. He now is annoyed and threw the kahwa out. They quickly went outside to make their work done, but what a wrath has fallen, the snowman was lying down broken. The Raju; village’s naughty boy; with his gang has destroyed the snowman and are laughing and mocking them. For Yousuf and Yamin it was dissolution of their endurance and faces turned wretched, the lava within their appetite flowed and raged against the oppressors but were deceptively badly beaten and wounded. Returning home with tears and gloomy face went to the kitchen and cried alone. His mother at door is calling; what is matter my dear son. Yousuf came out with tears wiped and said nothing about; I got hurt by falling down. Thinking about the incidence he imagined as rewinding situation when Raju and his gang were beating him; he incarnates the divine power and crushes all of them, holding Raju with his neck; suddenly his mother called him between his dreams he woke up from the glimpse of illusion. He tells his mother –‘why some people are cruel and oppress others, when they can do well to others and receive respect rather what they choose wrath’.
-‘It’s all just matter of time that a person feels low and weak only when fear has embraced his soul’ replies Ruhi.
She also says that the power and oppression can’t be broken in reality unless a person comes out from his conceited cloak. He lies on his floor looking to roof top before candle was going to melt and darkness covers walls. He remembers when he was kid he and his father was playing with him in snow and make snow man. Today’s incidence of raju’s outrageous activity breaking his snowman hurt his emotions as he was rebuilding his memories and Raju dismantled it by his cruel and inhumane deed. A tear rolled from his eye and he closed them and slept, taking blanket over his head.
Next day he went out forgotten past and embracing new day, he calls his best friend and went roaming through the steeps; they have become slippery. It is hard to manage balance, Yousuf and Yamin's both hold their hands together and passed the gorge. I am missing her badly said the Yousuf to yamin. Whom are you missing said the yamin. Like you don’t know anything said Yousuf.
Both went again towards the mountain, they were walking crushing snow, the snowfall has made a landslide across the river; the hill is apple bitten. This had devastated many trees along. There they found many people gathered as ants over the apple, they too went to check what's going and bring news to the village. The people were cutting the trees, machines are slaughtering trees as carrots are been cut, they followed them and observed they are been logged in the big trucks and taken away. Khan Sabh is guiding them and instructed woodcutters to finish the job in anyhow by today. They too collected some sticks which were lying down and they took it with themselves for using them to burn them to cook food.
While returning carrying a large weight of sticks on their back, a village boy said them to change the way as the black bear has been found walking around. Did you saw him with your own eyes said yamin? No I heard from ‘gaffer kak’ said the boy. They now turned back and now they had to take a long route which was to go above the cliff. In the mid, the murmuring and checkering sound are coming through the trees. Yousuf is keenly focusing towards the gallery of trees keeping his hand on a tree. It was a ghost invisible following them, Yamin said he is afraid and wants to get back down. They put the wood down and were walking slowly to escape. They were caught from behind by someone. They shouted with ear piercing sound. The crows on tree flew away as they were watching them for a long and the mountain shook. It was Raju, the notorious guy; he slapped them and said ''shut up''.
Raju said them what are you doing here and someone behind said they are sneaking us.
Raju was anguished and used bad language and slap them again,
Catching them by the hair he crumpled them down in snow and bumping punches.
Yousuf and Yamin started crying and murmuring and repeating that ‘we are not sneaking but had lost way to home’.
One of the gang men said they saw everything, if they will spread in the village, my father will kill me.
Raju; was seeing them like a crocodile with open mouth, said ‘will you say anyone about us’.
Both of them want to save themselves and they had not seen anything what they were talking about.
One of the gang men who had lost his mind with overdose of intoxicants came trifling and from one tree to other holding a big glass bottle; he suggested to bury them here and no one will come to know ever.
Yousuf and Yamin where frightened and took a long breathe and all shaded up before Yousuf; Yamin pushed Raju and he fell like a tree down. They are running as snow rabbit and the gang was after them like foxes. Yousuf looks on his left side he saw the ghost running and following him he changes the direction and fells down and Yamin couldn't do anything except running and inform the village. They captured Yousuf and was been kicked by all the gangsters. Raju's father is The Khan he was afraid of his father as he usually beat him for his misconduct and behavior. Raju is a notorious guy he threw Yousuf from high altitude. Yousuf was rolling down from one stone to other in snow; he went down the steep and got an injury on his knee. One of gangster said Yamin has escaped and he is going to tell in the village and we will be caught by police.
'' I don't want to get in jail'' said among them,
'' Let’s run from the village'' said the other,
“Let’s find him and take him to the village so that we could be saved'' said another one,
‘‘Shut up all of you, or I will break your stupid barking mouths'' said the Raju.
They all decided to escape from the village for couple of days. But Raju was confident that he won’t be caught, so he went back to home.
Yamin reached home and is frightened, his father catches the unease of his son and calls him to come near him and explain what has happened to you, who had made you like a broken stick. He told his father the story and pleaded him to save Yousuf from Raju and associates. They informed Yousuf's mother about the incident that he is been captive by Raju. Ruhi is shocked to listen, she went crying towards the place and took along with her the Yamin's father and reached the place. The place was empty leaving behind the marks on snow and sneaking crows. They were searching here and there following the marks and they disappear, as the land had swallowed him or sky had theft. The worry and hurry had kneeled Ruhi but the endurance won’t stop. It is going to be evening, they returned to the village and went straight to Khan Sabh and tell him about the incident, Khan was nagged on listening and shouts like a demon calling his son to come here Raju, he got faint on listening to his father’s anguish, he came down and came before them; what is matter dad you called me said Raju. What are they saying about you is it true said Khan. He said I don’t know anything about. Khan said to Ruhi; did you listen, he said he didn’t know, so leave from my house and don’t defame my son. Ruhi shouts, cries before Khan; please give my son back. Have you gone mad, get out right now said Khan? Ruhi went in despair out of the house. The Khan captures the hair of Raju and slapped him and shouts where he is. Raju in shivering and speaks in trembling; I don’t know anything. You moron I am your father I know what plague you are said the Khan. We threw him down the cliff replied Raju. On hearing this Khan is shaken and is holding his heart that he might be under heart attack. He is up-roaring and said you are going to vanish everything what I had built with deception and power. Khan told him, now let’s save him; otherwise your life will get ruined by the hands of law.
Khan said him show me the place and he took along with himself his men and they reached the place handling torches and rifle. The terrifying voices and cold crumbled the Khan but is worried about his status. They reached the bottom but there was nothing.
‘’Where is he now’’ said the Khan
‘’ I don’t know, he must be here’’ said the Raju
One of the workers of Khan said look the shoe is over here. But no trace of Yousuf is anywhere. Raju said look over there, there is someone looking on us. Two eyes glowing in dark, the image of death looking on them. The Khan fired a shot and the eyes disappeared. Khan said Yousuf might be eaten by wild bear or leopard. They were going to move Raju’s leg got stuck it is Yousuf buried below snow. They took him out and check his pulse. The heart is still beating and they took him with themselves. The fire shots had been heard by the villagers and the army. The Major of Army came out of his camp and looking towards the mountain. He calls his men to message the informers to keep the vigil on the villages and inform any suspicious activities.
Khan took him to his home and called Ruhi over there. She was sanctified on looking his boy lying on bed. She told Khan if anything happened to his son she will kill your son also and blaze your house. Khan said I saved your son from the bed of death and put myself in danger in the forest and we were also attacked by the wild animals, now this is what you are returning me with, so much anguished words of vengeance.
-‘I know what are you and unless there isn’t any interest behind such sympathy you wouldn’t had done such’. Ruhi told him to leave and she remained with him along the night in the Khan’s house, singing rhymes. In the morning she decided to leave, Khan is insisting to take rest over here and will take him to the doctor also. But the mother can’t stay at the place that is responsible for all the mishap. She took him on her back and set towards her home.
Yousuf was laid on the floor mattress in his home and surrounded by neighbors and friends. The ‘samovar’ is boiling with tea for kin’s and folk visiting to met him and provides some foods and money as traditional assistance. People are talking about the incidence and blames Raju’s crookedness, disguise behavior and outrageous acts. Yousuf has not yet even talked about the incidence, what actually happened. Khan Sabh approached their house and sat beside Yousuf, gave sympathy in his soaring voice. Women left the room and set outside while men gathered to hear the Khan. He said Ruhi to come here and offered her some money as compensation for his Son's committed battery. Behind his sympathy lies the fear that Ruhi might launch F.I.R against his Son and his son’s character will be assassinated and his reputation will be ruined. The kotwal (police men) approached their meanwhile as they had listened about the incidence. He questioned Yousuf and told him to tell and describe the incidence, Khan is shivered and threatened within, his gloomy face, and hanging moustaches reflect the fear. He spoke in between and told kotwal he is still in state of fear and needs some time to recover and will bring him to the police station after he recovers. The kotwal agreed and left the village as Khan was prominent men in area and contestant in elections for the province.
Khan took his wallet out and summed some bucks and gave to Ruhi; she is poor women but not greedy, she denied his offer and said I won’t do anything against your son but I leave the matter to All Mighty, before whom Khan and Ruhi are equal. She spared the life of Raju, Khan was now relaxed. Yousuf is been now served by her mother and sister and friends. The accident made Yousuf very anguished and angered, He is recovering fast and his mother took him to doctor. He wants to teach Raju lesson. It is very hard for women from remote area to carry his young son to market. They managed and yamin is assisting his mother along. They reached the doctor and waiting for their turn he saw their girl ‘Zooni’, she has come with her sick mother. He was surprised and blooming inside, forgetting his pain; watching with desperate eyes. She came forward and said what happened to him, you are the same guy who was giving 10th grade exam in the school. He was fascinated and quiet and yamin replied yes we are same. Yousuf spoke how are you and how where your papers. She replied ‘mine papers are outstanding and I will get distinction’. Yousuf was stuck as he thinks he won’t qualify and can’t compare Zooni and she will not accept him. Her mother came and said her let’s leave and she left looking back with a smile. He was filled with joy and feels his life’s purpose had accomplished for a while. The doctor said he is fine and put the plaster on his leg and they left for home. All the way along he is glowing and unfocused wondering in her thoughts. They reached home and tonight he had the best sleep in his life.
It is again snow fall, Yousuf is excited to see snow and in morning, Yamin came inside and took him on his shoulders. There is standing tall in wonderful snowy garden the snowman, waiting for Yousuf to come out. Yousuf is standing and looking on the smiling face and resembling recovery. They were all outside the house rejoicing and suddenly the cramp sounds, the roof has crushed down leaving them homeless and restless. It was the fear of Ruhi all along year; she was disgraced but thankful that her family had survived from the accident. The winter is hard and even worst after they became homeless; the villagers decided to lend some money and also approached Khan to get money for the poor Ruhi. But he denied and said give him money back which already they had borrowed. The villagers made a program and went into mosques of the entire area and announced to collect money for Ruhi, so that she could built the roof and live with dignity. The people provided as possible and collected 50k bucks and gave money to Ruhi. Khan came to her and said I have listen you have collected lot of money from begging. So give me them, now. She was unable to defend her problem and suddenly Yousuf entered with rage and told Khan to get lost from his home. Khan was not going back today and his men entered with long stick, but the villagers assembled and covered them all and warned him and his men to leave. Khan was surprised to see the revolt of people, but he endeavoured to crush their appetite by his gangsters. People were on anguish and protected Ruhi’s family from the greed of Khan. He has to set back and run for his life today. He was very angry on Ruhi and people and their transgression. Villagers showed fraternity and managed to build her home within days. But they are residing at yamin’s home for the day till their own house is reconstructed properly and safe to enter.
Khan is encroaching from his house seeing Ruhi and gets unhappy; he wants vengeance as soon as possible.
-‘I won’t spare you now and unless I will take my revenge I won’t remain at rest’ he takes the sips of vengeance and closes his window.
He is waiting for a movement when he will kneel down Ruhi and villagers. Khan left the village and went downmarket in his hotel. The village seems to attain freedom after Khan has exiled; villagers think so. Khan has left due to problems faced without electricity and road. He is a businessman and politician he needs proper facilities to operate his business. But for people it was the period of relief and tranquility.
Yamin came rushing to Yousuf with excited appetite and said him that zooni is here in the village. He was bloomed to listen and went out with his plaster in his leg. They came to location where zooni is playing with the village girls. But what is she doing here said Yousuf. She is cousin of Masood replied yamin. Masood is the villager and friend of them too. They approached to Masood and said him to do something for him. Masood was displeased but didn’t react and replied anything in front of them. Zooni had listened about the incidence of Yousuf and she had sympathy for them. She came to him and became their good friend, nowadays he is engaged whole day with her roaming, chatting and visualising the beauty of village yet he is under plaster but he manages to walk and climb the mountains. He wants his plaster to be torn and set him free.
His mother decided to take him to doctor and take it out. Zooni also came along with them. He had spring in the winter. The doctor removed the plaster from his leg. It is extremely painful and his leg is swelled, he can’t make movement, doctor said everyone feels same, don’t worry all will be fine. He and along Ruhi, yamin and zooni went back to home with happiness. Khan is watching from his hotel and shouts. They are terrified to see him, he came down to street and said; what is going Ruhi and Yousuf has your leg recovered now, and smiled with his cunning face. They replied silently, yes. They stepped slowly and moving, behind he said I am coming as winter is going and snow is melting. I am going to take your house then. Khan left them and goes back to his hotel.
Zooni said them who was this person laughing as Hog. They said he is Khan of our village, disguise and deceit man. After a long walk they finally reached home. It is very painful for Yousuf but the presence of zooni compensated it. On the door of Ruhi there is Masood and the mother of zooni, they scolded her where you have been all day, we were wondering and seeking you everywhere, I am literally dead waiting for you. Ruhi said she was with us and we had gone to doctor; please don’t scold her she is innocent. Zooni’s mother took her and went away. Yousuf was staged and looking silently as owl. Yousuf and Yamin where together and are taking dinner and Yamin said I think Masood is the culprit who had made all this mess. Yousuf agrees and said we will teach him lesson some day. They are unaware that Zooni’s mother has gone back to their home. In morning they went to met her, she is nowhere, where is she. From the left came voice, it’s Masood; she has left and went to her home. Yousuf is standing still and can’t do anything right now. He walked back to his home. The beautiful glimpse of his affection is enough to make its days.
They are residing in Yamin's house and he has been free to move now. He and the villagers collectively worked and build their house again and they entered with dignity. Zainab has lost the phone also and has now no contact with Aquib his boyfriend. He has been depressed as he lost contact with her. He has visited Pahalgam with his friends, they are seeking her. But she lives very far from the market and he has no concept about her accurate location. There he met Raju and he told him to give information about her. He captured Aquib and called his gangster. They beat him badly and he came out from the hotel, on seeing Aquib his friends fight with Raju and his gang. It became a big issue in the market and raised tribalism and many villagers assembled and they caught them and put Aquib and his friends in the stable. The police had got the Intel and they reached there and searching for them. They brought them out and caught many youngsters. Yousuf is also in market but he don’t know anything and he is looking on the crowd, he went back home and said his mother that today Raju beat some Anantnag boys badly. Zainab is listening to them but she has no idea and didn’t relate it to herself. The police had took them to the hospital and returned them back to their hometown. The boys are very agonized and anguished on being beaten in the village. They have assembled their gangs and are searching the people living from pahalgham and beat them in the town. The matter is catching fire and becoming very crucial matter. The police is been directed to take steps and settle the dispute as soon as possible.
***
Pheran
(The long garment)
Pheran (the long garment)
Yousuf and yamin are busy with their daily day life collecting water and breaking the logs for burning purpose. A village boy comes to them and speaks ‘the results might be declared in a couple of days’. On listening to this news both of them are crumpled and went home with silence. Yamin has got dumb and doesn’t talk with anyone. He is worried that he might have to re-appear. His mother went to Ruhi and said Yamin is irritated, what about Yousuf, she said ‘yes he is also tense and silent since yesterday’. They brought them out and said what is the problem and they finally spoke ‘the results will be declared in few days’. Their mothers are happy but they both know what they have done in papers and what they said at home. Ruhi is dreaming that his son has set on the voyage to the Moon.
The results are declared by the state board of school education, it is tough time until they check the merit list. They visited the market to check the results, along the path Yamin had vomited several times due to fear. Others guys are laughing on him –‘why are you so serious about results, either we qualify or not it is same to us’. Yousuf told him to take rest and let the other guys move on. After a while they had also moved towards market.
-‘I don’t know what will be my fate if I would be failed; I can never then qualify the paper again’.
-‘oh bro yamin don’t worry you have done better than me, think what will be mine fate’. Yousuf laughs but yamin is very tense his mood is gloomed and shunned into darkness.
They reached the place and he saw many students rejoicing and some in despair. The villager boy came to him and said I have qualified but mathematics has been reappearing. The guy who was taunting him while they were walking is sitting on river and crying desperately. Yamin found his roll number, he is checking his enrollment and he saw, the flowers burst from his heart and heavens pondered sprinkles of joy on him when he saw himself qualified in all the subjects. But Yousuf’s roll number seems missing he is checking the gazette but his roll number is absent. Yamin is jumping like kangaroo and shouting as wolf. He has made it and washed his desperation. Yousuf merit list is missing he came out from crowd and told yamin his roll number is missing. He has hang between two hills and doesn’t know either he has qualified or not.
Yamin told him you keep seeking and I will go to visit my father and inform him about my result. Yousuf is waiting over there and Zooni came to check the result she saw him sad and gloomed. –‘What is the matter Yousuf why are you so down’. He replied ‘my roll number is missing from the gazette’, she said ‘don’t worry’ she took her mobile phone and told him to say his roll number. She smiled and said you have qualified the exam. What is your result Zooni; I have also qualified replied Zooni. Yousuf said how many marks have you obtained; I have secured distinction and I am among topper in whole pahalgham block. Yousuf got very happy and even more excited for her results. It is time to party for both of them, rejoicing and blissful are they. Yamin came back and he was also informed by them about qualification. Zooni left from there and they are running towards their village to tell their merits. They have been tired running and stopped near the river, watching the gorge with happiness. They have decided to go and visit town and get some new clothes after some days. They reached home and broadcasted their results both of them attained average marks. Their parents are happy and made desserts and offered to village.
Yousuf has not been happy never as he is today after qualifying his examination. He goes into the meadows and sits there. He speaks –‘Abu I made it, I have qualified my 10th grade examination’. His eyes are full and emotion bulked he sits for long talking to himself he looks forward and sees the ghost before him from long distance. He sets forward to talk to him but from his behind a sound came, he looks backward and found his sister calling him, he looks forward and the ghost has disappeared again.
Ruhi is very excited by his son’s performance, her heart and mood is blissful and between Yousuf speaks –‘mom someone is following me continuously, where ever I go he follows me, he never talks to me but keeps staring, I wonder who he is’. Ruhi speaks –‘tomorrow I will take you to Peer Subh definitely now’.
Next day they are roaming in market and he saw Zooni and went to meet her. She said him she is shopping and has to go to Srinagar for further studies. He has no words and said –‘all the best and I will pray for your bright future’. He had no idea that she will leave the area. He was hoping that she will study at higher secondary of pahalgham and they will rejoice over their along studying. But his dream has been flushed by her higher marks, now he is worried that she will go to Srinagar and his story is over. He is anxious to lose her due to his low marks. ‘Don’t worry Yousuf we will be always friends and I will be in touch with you’ said Zooni. But Yousuf’s instincts tell him he has lost her now. He wants also to go Srinagar for studies. Zooni left him and Yousuf is roaming in market, but the eyes from the woods are staring him.
Yousuf is lost in thinking ‘she will leave the area and in city she might change, she will forget me and she will make new friends’. He is sitting at his home and taking tea, the tea is very hot, he takes sip and shouts. ‘What is this’. Ruhi speaks ‘when you are attention is lost you even can’t see the tea is hot’.
-‘how can I see the tea is hot’.
Yousuf tells his mother ‘mom I want to say you something’.
-‘yes dear speak frankly’.
-‘can I go to Srinagar’.
-‘Srinagar for what, why you want to go over their’.
-‘I want to study their’.
-‘but why you want to go so far when you can study at the village near me’.
-‘no, I want to go’.
-‘it is not possible as you know the economic condition of ours, how will you go’. Yousuf gets very sad in being poor.
Zooni has been admitted in Srinagar in tuition centre to study for Mbbs, he wants to talk with her but before he reached his village she has left for the Srinagar. He was crunching with guilt that he has been burdened with family and he doesn’t concentrate on studies and which affected his compassion. Next day Masood approached him and told him that Zooni has message for you; she will wait for you at Shalimar garden on Friday. He and his associates decide to visit Srinagar, in meanwhile Yousuf's mother is worried about the clothes; the accident of Yousuf has torn his clothes she decided to get the ‘Pheran’ from the Anantnag town; which is about 50kms away. Yousuf came to know her mother’s plan so he planned to visit Srinagar and told his mother; ‘The village children have decided to go together for shopping to Anantnag, so I will go with them’. She had doubt and did not want to let Yousuf alone; he told her that ‘Yamin is also going to town’. Making her to convince psychologically so she called him and guided them to be together and take care of each other. As Yousuf is going for first time alone to town without his mother she worries for him. She had saved some money, grain by grain and kept them hidden in the wall. She took them out and gave some money to Yousuf as she estimates and sent him to the town to get Pheran for himself and Zainab.
The village boys’ caravan has left the village with joy and reached the market of village where they had to board the bus. The bus has got overcrowded and have no place to enter, They can't let it go as it is the only cheap source to travel for long distance, boys have decided to sit on the cargo hanger of the bus. One by one all of them sat and were open in chilling wave to view the mesmerising scenery. The turns and shifts are breathtaking for Yousuf but the appetite is enriching intensely as encountering dangerous ride of the bus. The branches of trees are slapping, every time they bowed and laughed saving themselves. The destination is covered by seeming unending and tidy. They hide in their Pheran and rubbing hands. The cold is now unbearable and they decided to get down. They shout to driver and made him stop the vehicle. They managed to enter inside hardly. People are pushed like cattle’s in the Bus. Finally they reached to their destination, they step-down and rush behind 'Javaid' who had been often travelling to Anantnag and knows well about the Town.
They reached the Town and are roaming through Lal-chowk and looking for a great deal to buy best clothes at affordable price. The magnificent shops and decorations are sparkling and look they are calling to people, to come inside. He saw people in lines buying various commodities he and companions are wondering, he wants to buy everything, but hardly could afford them. In some shops he liked the garment but the price are too high and where the prices are low the garment was not good. But the young age and exciting appetite couldn't resist taking the food across the footpath that makes a roll and adds some salad. In between Yousuf said he is going to railway station and journey for Srinagar. ‘The Srinagar is the main city of state and there are lots of amazing stuff to buy and hang out’ said Yousuf.
They have been planning it for many days. The chance they got today won’t repeat again in near future. All these guys are passionate to visit the city and get exclusive stuff for them. Yamin seems quite disturbed but cant let them go and leave him alone. He was unable to deny their offer to visit the City Srinagar.
Yousuf is eager. They board the local minibus and reached the railway station. Yousuf had not yet travelled in a train or has even seen it; only heard about and seen on the books. They planned and promise each other, that no one will speak about visiting Srinagar at village and we shall return early before sunset. The horn bangs Yousuf and the train approached with shaking earth, it appeared as mighty python with hundreds of men swallowed by it and gives Goosebumps to them. The people are rushing to get inside; the pull and push of people is crushing the bones. Hardly have they managed to enter and he came near the window. He is thinking about his mother and worried ‘if her mother will knew about outgressing she will definitely be displeased’.
The train started with giving a loud horn and slowly moving and gaining speed crossing the bridges as a storm. Yousuf is seeing through the window and is fascinating and wondering as he is flying to meet his beloved. The Snow has covered every corner of the world. The hawk flying parallel is challenging us. We gave it a tough competition but train stops after every 10 minutes at several places leaving us behind in the race. The crowd gets enhanced more and more. Looks everyone wants to visit Srinagar.
''The announcement states the train has arrived to Srinagar''. All the people rushed in such a hurry some fell down, so do these friends run outwards and pushing and pulling each others to board the bus which is waiting outside. The bus service is less than the people in the train which make the whole voyage a hectic and problematic for the common person. The people entered like cattle in the Bus. Some are successful to take a seat and mostly not. Fortunately, Yamin has been successful to take the seat and calls Yousuf to stand along with him. Yousuf is annoyed by same nature of people everywhere. He says there is no difference in village and city all people rush like cattle’s. The next person to Yamin is smoking continuously, it made them suffocated and irritated. The bus delivered them below the flyover between the Capital. They all walked over the bridge and reached Lal-chowk of Srinagar. Both the cities have a common name of market. Here the market is grander and vast then Anantnag. They wonder in streets to find her, it is not their village that they will get anyone without address, he says to yamin ‘she has told me to meet at Shalimar garden, where is that place’. Yamin said him ‘let’s first shop and later go over there’. They went into the Shop and found the rates are too high and can't even buy here also a single garment. Moving and searching they find a small shop where they hold plenty of garments. He managed to purchase the pheran for Zainab and his Mother and also took a gift for Zooni.
All the guys have got their attire and now they want to go to Shalimar garden which is across the Dal-lake. Yousuf hardly knew anything and was on their will. They all are walking with a smiling face and the road is been closed by the security persons and checking papers. They are also moving forward and were approached by these men and had a brief questioning about their name, place and purpose of being here. The inspector said to his men to check also their I.D cards. Yousuf thanked heartly to his mother to handover his school card while leaving home. The police are checking their bags and returned their I.D cards.
Suddenly a loud cry behind is heard, some boys are shouting and the guards became alert and said ‘leave fast’. Hundreds of people are coming towards them. Everything gets into chaos and panic has veiled the entire place. They are in rush to save themselves and the hands of these best friends slip in the crowd, people were running as they were anguished, running here and there, he is seeking for Yamin but the crowd took him with force leaving him alone and far from his friend. He escaped through the narrow street which took him towards Dal-gate. A person waiting for bus suggested him, not to go there for a while and spend your time over here till situation gets normal. He asked him that where Shalimar garden is. He replies it is along this road but can’t be travelled by walking; you need to board the Bus. He decided to wait for them here and sat on the bench of SUV’s public stand.
Yamin and other friends have been despair and lost, they are seeking each other’s and find most of them, and one of their friend is badly beaten by security persons in ‘laathi charge’. They took him to hospital, yamin is thinking about Yousuf, where he would be and in what condition. While Yousuf is waiting and he asking time to every person passing him. He thought Zooni will get upset and he boards the mini bus. He is continuously looking through the door. The streams of a lake just blew his conscious. Yousuf is walking along and he found hundreds of Houseboats in the lake. Built glamorously and eye-catching views of hills and mountains were adorable and blissful. He had seen Dal-Lake and houseboats on books only, but today he is between them for the first time. This made him fascinated and wondering along the lake unaware of time. He reached Shalimar garden which is located on the bank of lake. The bus conductor shouts ‘all passengers of Shalimar come out and keep their fare in hand’. A beautiful garden made by ‘Mughal’s’ in medieval period. He entered the garden but could not find Zooni anywhere; he thought he has been late, so she might have left. He is searching everywhere in garden. He sat down and put his legs in water. He heard the Azaan; ''Allah-hu-Akbar'' and just remembered its Asar and time to go home. He could not meet Zooni, but the time he spent while roaming was one of milestones for his life.
Yamin and his friends got discharged after they got his checkup and x-ray. The doctor had given him clearance for his discharge. They hire Autorikshwa and went directly to the place where they will board the bus for Railway station. They are waiting for Yousuf for sometime but he didn’t returned and they decided to leave. The bus started moving, Yamin is looking through window seeking Yousuf in crowd but he is nowhere. They thought he has boarded before them, as this bus is last one towards railway station. Yousuf is also travelling towards Dal-gate and he is walking towards the bus stand, it took him much time to reach over there. He is looking here and there and asking people where he would get the bus and mostly replied you are at right place, he waits for some time over there, seeking yamin but he is not there. Many thoughts come to his mind and most worry him he might be left at Srinagar all alone tonight. He is staring at people and seeking his friends and spent time waiting for the bus and friends but neither of them arrived. He is alone and lost. He is holding bag of pheran. He thinks what if they have left or they had lost. How will he manage to reach his village? He is missing his family and friends in centre of burghal.
***
Kuney zuun
(Left alone)
Kuney zuun (Left alone)
Unfortunately, the Bus has left. He is now alone and in mid of nowhere. He is looking here and there looking for Yamin. He knows he will be waiting for him; he sits on the footpath waiting. The Autorikshwa driver is looking at him he came near and said ‘where you had to go’. He replied ‘he is waiting for his friends and have to travel towards railway station’. Autorikshwa driver said that the last bus for railway station has left already. Yousuf; He is hanged and said when has it left. -‘About an hour and the train would have also reached to destination’ said Autorikshwa driver. The situation is adversity and disaster for him, the incidence will make his mother panic and mutilate all his credibility before his mother. He doesn’t understand what to do and how to travel back to his home which is more than 100kms far away from the city.
The sun had set and Yousuf is crying and frightened, he stood up and started walking, he stopped a person walking across the road –‘where would I get the vehicle for Anantnag’, he directed him to go through lal-chowk and board vehicle from Stand. He is walking towards, but the road has been closed after the chaos had ignited, the barricades and security personnel don’t allow anyone through Lal-chowk. He makes parallel way walking on the banks of Jhelum. He is terrified and hopes that he reach his home. Zooni lives in a hostel which is located on the Jhelum banks from where he is walking. Zooni is listening music and holding book, she looks through the window and saw Yousuf from above, she calls him but he could not hear her voice, she rushes down but she is stopped by the warden, she makes some lame excuses and comes out from the hostel. But he has moved quite far, she is rushing towards him. He till reached Zero-bridge but he went in wrong direction towards the residential colony rather than Dal-gate, where he could get any vehicles which will travel towards Anantnag.
He is tired and hungry and sat on the bench; there are many students on the street who are getting in vans. He said one of the drivers’s to take him along, but he replied they are reserved seats for students only. He is wondering, where he will go now and where he will sleep tonight. Zooni is also walking towards but he has again left the place and is moving forward. Zooni is searching him but in crowd she can’t find him. She recognizes his pheran from far and shouts, but the noise of students in street fades her voice. The hush and rush of students straightens her from Yousuf.
Yousuf is staring on these students; he wonders this is the place where students across the valley come to get education in multi-complex buildings. He sees the board handing which labels fees around 100 thousand bucks. He feels disheartened that he cannot afford them and can never get admission in such tuition centers.
Yousuf has walked quite inside the colony of rich men’s; he looks at every house and hotel while walking. A person staring and screaming at him; wearing long coat and turban, comes near to him and says ''you boy what are you doing here''; he snatched his bag and said; '' from where you had theft this'' before Yousuf would answer the person slapped and kicked him. Zooni is watching the incidence from a far distance. Yousuf is terrified and lying down on the road he just got the glimpse of the movement when his father was taken by some people. He is anguished he rose up and snatched the bag from that person and run away.
Zooni is heart breakingly running towards him but till she reached Yousuf has ran away very far and disappeared in the cloak of sunset. The man is murmuring and abusing him, she said him –‘why you beat him, you are a monster’. He replies her with anger and abusing words -‘get lost’. She can’t run after him now anymore she is tired and panting, the darkness has veiled the state. Zooni is looking towards the street from where he ran. She can’t do anything and left in desperation towards her hostel.
-‘Yousuf where you will wonder in the wilderness, the ghost living in palaces will haunt you for night and the chilling winds will kill you, oh my God, please save him’.
***
Yamin and other friends have reached Anantnag and are travelling in bus; they are worried that where Yousuf would be, yamin thinks if he hasn’t boarded the train. What answer I will give to his mother when she will question about him.
On other side Ruhi is continuously looking towards door, that he will return but hour ends, she gets anxious about him, she is trembling and holding her heart she went to Yamin’s home but yamin too is absent, his mother speaks –‘Ruhi don’t worry they will be coming, they have went first time alone to market, they would be enjoying their time’. She has inquired several times since afternoon but her patience is breaking.
Yousuf is crying and running with empty stomach, he is running and running till he gets far from the colonies and reached the downtown. He sat on the cart of street vendor, who has kept on the side of street; he is weeping and missing his mother. A person wearing long pheran approached him; '' hay; Boy what are you doing''. Seeing the man Yousuf shouts the ghost of wilderness is following him in the city he flew. He thinks the man is after him. Running from one street to other, he is seeking any place to hide. He heard the Azaan of Isha and went within the mosque, kept his shoe on the shelf and set in the ''Hamam''. A place in the mosque which is heated by burning wood below the stone tablets bed. He sits down there; making his body warm and continuously looking at the entrance gate.
-‘the ghost cannot enter the God’s place’.
-‘why I lied to my mooji, I swear will never do so again in my entire life, please God let me go and reach my place’.
The people have completed their Nimaz and are coming in the gallery of Hamam. People are seeing him and some people questioned him ‘who are you’, from where you belong, what is in the bag. This time he couldn't run but remained silent and pledged them'' please forgive me and give me some food I am hungry from morning''. One among the crowd told him don't worry and tell us what the problem is. Yousuf said I want to go home as I have lost the way. From which place you belong said the man in crowd? I am from pahalgham replied Yousuf. People started whispering; look at him look how dirty is he, he can't be let alone in the mosque and they don’t even trust his words. Some said ‘then take him to your own house’ and finally, they decided to let him to sleep in the mosque for night but warned him not to touch anything here.
He got some relief and feels quite better when the tablets got hot and his body warm. Later a person came to mosque holding a bag, he comes towards him and sat beside him, he opens the bluish bag and took out the lunch box. Yousuf gets happy, his eyes get full he hugs the person, he replies –‘take food it is the place of God and you are way farer, you have divine right to take shelter and food’. The person has also got a blanket for him.
He ate food and covered the blanket and is lying down to sleep. He is thankful to God for making some men best among us and pay heed to people like us. The mishap has made him anxious and now a faith healer and wishes that morning arrive fast.
In the night hours his eyes open he feels cold coming from the door, someone has opened the door and kept it wide open; the cold coming from there is shivering him. The Hamam is dark but the main gallery of mosque has lights on, so the Hamam has some light, his eyes got stock on someone sitting before him keeping his head in pheran. He is staring him and covers himself in blanket; the stranger lifts his head slowly. He sees the same person who is following him ‘the ghost’ is in front of him.
He is terrified and shouts. ‘‘Please don't kill me''. And a voice came from the inner mosque ‘don't shout we are worshipping here, sleep or get out from here’. This gave him really a relaxing time, that’s he isn't alone. The stranger before him speaks ‘Yousuf don’t feel afraid, I won’t harm you, and I am here with you’.
-‘who are you and why are you following me every time where ever I go’.
The stranger laughs and says -‘I don’t follow you but you never leave me alone, whenever you are alone you wonder in thoughts’.
-‘I don’t understand who are you, are you my thoughts, what connection I have with you’.
-‘I will answer every question to you, but right now you must sleep’.
Now he is laying and shivering as the stone tablets have cooled and become chilled. The man gave him his pheran. Yousuf took it and just veiled his body along with the blanket. The stranger suggested him to leave early to the Bus stand and board the bus. In deep thoughts and missing his mother he fell into the slumber. Yousuf; is dreaming in which he sees the snowfall and he and his sister are making the snowman, and his mother making a path along. Her mother calls them to take some ''nooni chai''; Tea. They went into the home along with them was the snowman. Her mother said why you brought him inside it will melt and they kept him on the door. Yousuf is staring towards snowman and it flipped its eye, it looks like the stranger or the ghost.
Yousuf woke up from his dream. He is looking with strange eyes, where he is. The stranger has left, he is alone and –‘who is he, there is something between him and me, what is that element which brings us together’.
The whole body has shrink in pain; he heats up by jumping to raise blood temperature. He went into the mosque’s bathroom which is inside the mosque, he took bath with lukewarm water and prayed Nimaz and is waiting for sunrise. He is happy that he will go home and doesn’t know what he shall answer to his mother. It is cold and frosty outside, he looks through the door –‘oh my God it is so pinching, I must wait for a while’. He sleeps again for a couple of hours and then leaves the mosque to travel towards his home.
***
Roomut bay darbeedar
(Despair and Lost)
Roomut bay darbeedar (Despair and Lost)
On the other side, Ruhi is waiting as she is eager that his son will come soon and has prepared ‘Halwa’ dessert and ‘Makkai tchoot’ chapati, for him. As the day is going to gloom her eagerness raised and have gone to the door several times and even Zainab noticed she said; don't worry mommy he will come he has many people along with him. The sun had set and the children of the village had returned. She came running and staring at them, her eyes were seeking her child but she found that Yousuf was missing. She went to Yamin's home and asked, where is my Son?'' Yamin could not answer and his body is crumbling and spoke ‘has he not reach yet’. No he didn’t, where you have left him speaks Ruhi. Yamin said in a very low speech that he was lost at Lal-chowk and after that we didn’t met. I thought he would have reached before us. Ruhi said how you could leave him their alone, where he would go in strange town and in what condition he might be and you knew he visited first time there. He has no idea about anything and situations are very dangerous these days; says Ruhi to yamin in distress and pain.
Yamin is silent and Ruhi is violent, she started crying and calling to the other neighbours and expressing her grief with sorrow and tears. Many people came over there to check what has happen. Yamin’s father slap him, he is crying and laid down, others villagers are also scolding Yamin and summed all the children of the village who had gone to Anantnag. They came to know one among them is been injured and don’t reveal how he got so badly injured. After a brief interrogation, one slipped that he got lost at Srinagar, not at Anantnag. Ruhi and other where shocked, ''Srinagar'' ''Srinagar'' ''Srinagar''; why you went there and how. They said we went in Train and at Lal-chowk we lost him in despairing of the crowd. Over their one among us got badly beaten and we took him to hospital. But Yousuf was not with us, we had lost him already at that moment. We waited for long, but he didn't return till hour collapsed and we had no way but to return, otherwise we all would have lost their. Ruhi falls down and is crying and shouting, where are you my son, come back, your mother will die otherwise.
The villagers decided to go to the police station tomorrow as it is very far from their place and its evening time. But Ruhi could not stop till morning she went out of the house and started running towards market. Among the villager saw her running out of the village and he came rushing –‘Ruhi has gone far from village and I have heard black bear is roaming down the Stream of Ladder River. The villagers are terrified and some courage full decided to take lanterns and sticks along with them and find Ruhi in the Woods. Ruhi ran for a long distance in the snow in open sky and full Moon but the atmosphere is hazy and chilling cold is crumpling her body. She is trembling and taking quick breaths holding her heart and appetite to find her son in the wilderness of chaos. Walking along the river she observed the silent murmuring behind her as someone seems following her. She looks behind but can’t see any person or animal. But the sounds come through the bushes and are continuously rising and coming towards her; she ran with her full strength and is panting. Suddenly her foot gets cramped and she fell down from an oversize stone. Her body is wrecked and is stiff to move, she turns slowly towards sky looking towards the Moon, it is full Moon and she stares at her, in the mist and haze of the scene there appeared a shape cloaking the Moon. It looks a like head with ears like horns; it is ''kharee-seeh'', Himalayan leopard. This is the face of the death and she takes a long breathe in fright that she will be killed but the face of his son and daughter came before her eyes. She thought it is her last minute and anxiousness spreads her consciousness. She thinks what will happen to them if she dies, I lost Yousuf and I will be killed by this demonic creature and Zainab will be left alone in pack of wolves, this gave her Goosebumps.
A fire through her loins fired her,
A cry of mother raged the pain,
Looking through the eyes of death,
She raised her broken kneels.
She shouts loud; the voice spread through the gorge all over the place, the villagers who are looking for her heard the voice.
-‘stop all, listen’……….. Cry…………… ‘It is her’ and they start running towards the same direction.
Ruhi is crawling and moving as the Leopard is impending closer, she picks a stone and threw on it, the cunning teethes and roars pierce her fate. She is moving slowly backwards facing towards leopard. The grunts behind the Ruhi made the leopard stop. Ruhi is stuck and looks behind slowly in fear it is large black wall raising high as night; it is the black bear. The leopard is roaring at it and bear is grunting the leopard jumps over the Ruhi and clashed with the bear. The clash of Titans has begun. The bear and leopard’s fight gave a snipping time for Ruhi to make an escape. The bear and leopard are fighting vigorously biting each other. Ruhi is endeavouring to run from the battle ground the bear catches leopard and threw it away and it falls on the Ruhi, she fells in the river. The leopard is watching her draining; it is following her across the stream to hunt her. The bear is grunting and the villagers are terrified.
The villagers arrived with fire torches and screams towards the bear, the bear is not afraid of them. He grunts and challenges them and warns by its monstrous sounds to make them run from his expanse. The villagers can't find the Ruhi they searched her near the incident compound but can’t find her the bear is between them he won’t let them stay. The villagers got scared and ran from there to save their life.
-‘you morons we cannot kill our self for sake of Ruhi, she is out of her senses, where the hell is she rushing’ speaks among the villager.
-‘I agree we must leave’ speaks another one.
-‘okay let’s leave’ replies another one and all of them decided to leave the place and march back towards village.
The water flow in winter is less as compared to summer, she is draining and trying to catch any stone and come out from the river. She managed to hold a branch of a tree which is in the river. She comes slowly out. She is unaware of the leopard is yet following her. The river is between her and the leopard’s envy. She looks towards another side of river, and leopard is standing tall on a big rock staring on her. She is hanged and terrified that now she can’t escape from the claws of death. The leopard seems not to get wet in cold and went away, leaving her is vanity and wilderness. She is peeping and staring over here and there. She stood up slowly and her clothes are wet, cold and heavy.
She is injured, tired and shivering, walking slowly and rested below the tree. She lit the fire with ancient method of ancient men when they discovered the fire and searched more wood to keep her body warm and also to keep animals away. The cold bites won't keep her alive for the night. One among the villagers looks back through the vast valley he found down the stream a light which is vibrant in snow –‘look over their’.
-‘what is it’ replies one among them.
-‘can’t you see it is fire, she could be Ruhi’.
-‘no how is that possible, it can be anyone even it can be army or rebels or dacoits, we can’t take chance’ replies one among them in fear hastiness.
-‘but, we can’t take chance, she could be Ruhi also, if she will die in cold what face we will give to our village and God’ replies the first person who sees the light.
-‘let’s check it also, as we came so far we must go their also now, more steps shall be endeavored’ replies the eldest of them.
And these villagers rushed towards there. They found Ruhi unconscious and veiled her with a blanket and took her back towards home. The villagers are moving through the road and from behind blows a loud horn, some vehicles are approaching, it is Army and they are been stopped, they are been inquired, the army men came rushing and surrounding them and ordered to drop all the stuff and keep their hands up. They put the blanket down and the Army Major asked them to open it, when they open it, major is keenly watching and he saw a woman in a blanket and he captured one of the villager and told him what are you doing and where are you taking her. They are shivering and said, sir, this is a village women she drowned in river and we rescued her, now we are taking her to home to provide her medicine and shelter.
The major did not believe on them and ordered his men to arrest all of them and take them inside camp. The villagers started crying ‘sir please leave us, we are innocent’. He replied ‘your innocence will be measured at camp only now’. They took them all inside and along Ruhi in their vehicles to their camp. On reaching camp he called to doctor and said to checkup this lady and said ‘bring all of them to interrogation room. On hearing it they are crushed within and one said I said you ‘we were going back and you brought me here and now we are all dead now. They will encounter all of us and our families will be ruined by this cursed woman’.
They are kept in room and all of them are silent and crying, the major brought a person in the camp who is wearing full mask and looks like indigenous. He is seeing one by one and told major they are not and he said, don’t worry you all are free but it is too late now and you can’t travel in this wilderness. So stay all of you at camp for night and leave early in the morning with this women. They want to leave from the camp though it is night and cold but army didn’t let them go and they stayed over there in same room. The fear and fright is not giving them peace and sleep seems despaired.
One among them speaks ‘are you seeing this log hanging from roof’. ‘Yes, what is it’ replies another one. He replies ‘this is the place where people are been hanged and beaten to death, I have heard who ever is been brought here doesn’t leave alive’. ‘Don’t make us scared, all will be fine, just keep faith and pray for mercy’ replies one among the listener in distress and shivering body. One by one all of them fell into deep slumber.
Ruhi is in medical camp under the army doctor and she puts her on ventilator and is been treated. She is resting there and is unconscious. She didn’t know after the moment when she had lit fire across river bank.
The ‘major’ approaches the room and they woke up in fright. One among them said ‘I was saying you all, they will kill us’. The major speaks to villagers; we saw fire at jungle so we came to check and we found all of you and they said ‘sir we also saw the same fire and came to rescue the women’. But I have heard you guys are smuggling the wood is that true’ speaks major. They spoke ‘no sir we were wondering and in between we heard some loud screams and we felt that someone is in danger and so we went to check it and suddenly we saw the light emitting from the gorge and we rushed towards it and found the woman and later you know the story’. Major is convinced by these villagers and he went out from the room.
-‘why don’t you speak about Yousuf’.
-‘I thought it to keep secret’
While in the village all are waiting for their men to come back but it is getting late and no one has came back yet. Whole of the village is terrified by such incident. Zainab has become dumb and is shedding tears and praying for better. The village has shuttered with grief and depression for the night. They guess randomly making stories this might had happen or other, that makes Zainab more anxious and suppress.
Ruhi is glimpsing and found herself and Yousuf are reaping the tilth and now after tidy day taking the maize in rags on their head, Yousuf slipped and he felt in the gorge and the maize felt in the ''ladder''. She went thrashing and looks in the deep of gorge; she saw the rags in water and Yousuf hanging on the tree. She is shouting for help and Yousuf cries holding tight. Suddenly all just gloomed and a voice piercing the sky she heard; Ruhi wake up. It is morning and she finds herself in strange place and she sees a army men and she gets up and doesn’t understand how she came here, she checks her clothes changed and thinks that her modesty is ripped. But a lady doctor comes inside and give sympathy and tells her she was rescued and brought under medical treatment, you and your villagers can now discharge you from the camp. She feels happy and comes out and sees the village men waiting in lawn. One army men came and informed them they can leave now and collect their belongings in the cabin. They went out and moved towards village. A man says you had compromised all our lives ‘I told you to stop and we will go to police station early in the morning’. ‘Now what you achieved; you risked everything and also our lives and families’. She is silent and pleads for forgiveness. The elder among the villagers said leave these pity matters, let us reach home first. They have even forgotten to make the police report even they are in market.
Ruhi and villagers reached their village and people are waiting, all men went to their respective homes, she also went to her home, where Zainab has dried her eyes crying whole night, and she is bloomed to see her mother returned. She said the story to her and told her we have to go back to the market and report the matter in police station. She changed her clothes and took her with herself. Yamin saw them and came behind them and said ‘I am also coming’. The past haunts her as she fainted that she might lose his son as her husband. In vanity and grief the kindle wiped out, fate despaired and light was yet twinkling in the red chambers. Though she is broken with distress and grief, she still hopes she might find her son.
They reached the police station.
-‘sir where we can file FIR’ yamin speaks to police men.
-‘wait in the corridor, sir will be coming down’. They are waiting in the corridor; yamin is looking around the police station he checks the board where many pictures are pinned. Yamin identifies some among them and in between the police men speaks ‘come inside’. And they reported the matter to SHO. She is crying desperately, looking on her condition the Inspector forwards the message to Srinagar police station.
They came out from the police station and are walking back to their home, Ruhi is tired and dehydrated, and she wants to drink water and pleads her daughter to get some water. She collects the water in a bottle which was lying across the river. Ruhi takes the sip and the cold water scratched her throat, she coughs, she is unable to drink water. They are walking and Khan crossed their way and approached with words,
-‘I have came to know you had been in a camp for a night’.
Ruhi, Zainab and Yamin are strained and looking what absurd and rubbish he is speaking. Zainab speaks ‘she faced an accident yesterday night and felt in Cold River and was then rescued and later taken to hospital for aid, you have no moral virtue khan’. –‘Shut up you silly girl’ speaks Khan. Khan wanted to make fun and abuse them but he knew people are aware already of the incident and know the reason. They left him and are walking back towards home. Zainab is anguished by his misbehaviour and murmurs with herself.
-‘how can anybody use such disgusting language, they don’t have eyes, they live in their conceited life’.
-‘Leave him he has always been a viper for us’ says Ruhi to Zainab. She replies ‘but this is outrageous and disgusting part of him, how can anyone be so cruel and tyrant, have they not to face God’.
Yamin replies –‘for them God is dead’.
They have reached to village where many women’s have assembled outside their house. They all are her sympathizers and went with her inside the house and are trying to calm her and provide emotional sympathy. Ruhi lay in her mattress and is listening the talks of women and in her deep thoughts she is worried and crunching every minute. She is desperately missing her child and can’t bare his distance. She thinks if any mishap would happen to her child she will suicide. In the thoughts and grief her eyes are full of tears, she want to be alone and gets irritated by the villagers talks. She wants to run uphill and cry over there. She wants to complain to All Mighty who has snatched her child. She murmurs ‘pleases forgive him and let my child return to me and take my life instead of him’. Between all chaos her body can’t bear the pain and depression, she fell unconsciousness. Zainab gets shocked, she lifts her and is crying on her bed side.
***
Kahwa at shrine
(The tea at Shrine)
Kahwa at shrine (the tea at Shrine)
Yousuf woke up as the sun’s rays befell on his face. It’s time to leave, He left the mosque premises and travels towards Bus stand with hope and he is chanting prayers that he might board the bus which will take him to his Home near his mother. He is desperately missing her mother and is walking in thoughts through empty streets, all the shops are closed and no one is walking on the street. He is wondering what has happened here. All shops and markets are deserted; yesterday they were vibrant and decorated, now only street dogs are sitting between the roads. Yousuf is afraid of the dogs; he slowly crossed them, so that he could make safe passage and from his left side came a terrifying voice, ‘BOOW BOOW’. It is one of the dog barkings on him. Yousuf ran carrying his bag and holding his heart, dogs are behind him, and the he is rushing and panting, streets are so silent he even hears the steps of dogs running behind him.
The panting is rising, lungs are pumping, legs raging and heart is besieged by fear, he feels he will be caught and tear him apart. At the end of the lane he found the door open of someone's house, he entered with crumpled life and also the dogs do. The house owner came out to stop Yousuf and in rampage he is bitten by the dog. Yousuf took a big stick, raging and bombarding them, after couple of minutes they finally flew away. Leaving Yousuf crumpled and the house owner injured. He is shouting for her wife to come out. She came running and find him injured and along Yousuf trying to lift him. The sons of house owner came rushing they hold him and started their car and took him to the hospital and the wife of the man is angry at Yousuf, ‘why you came to our house when dogs where behind; you don’t have’. Yousuf is dumb and didn’t reply a single word but instead keeps his gaze and head down. He feels guilty as innocent men got into problem by his fate.
Yousuf is wondering through street and suddenly the crowd approached shouting and running towards him, Yousuf and the women is looking at them, she rushed towards main entrance to close the door and Yousuf too rushed towards her. Many rushed randomly into the nearby houses where they find any door opened. Mostly the doors of the street where closed. The women said to a Person who is running in disparity ‘what had happened’, he replied the forces are dispersing the crowd and protesters and the curfew has been now imposed. The women of a house said to Yousuf to leave and get lost from here. He went out and walking in chaos and crimpled in dissolution and fear. Running along with the crowd through street to street. He saw an empty street along the main road he decided to go through. He is been stopped at the end of lane by a security person, he thought he would be beaten but they were the guards of the Government department. They questioned him and found he is a stranger and traveller and they suggested him to avoid the main road and walk through the narrow streets. After a while he is walking, an ugly jeep stopped before him he is watching it but someone came from behind, he holds his hand and took him through the street and they are both running and in meanwhile they hide in the municipal dustbin. They are shut and dumb holding their breath to be invisible for them.
The thrashing sound of the engine came near and the vehicle stopped before dustbin. They are seeking them and among one of them said ‘they have flew away’. Yousuf is shaking with fear as he thought he is going to be taken by them and will never return. Yousuf looks at the person who took him was no other than but the stranger whom he met in a mosque or the ghost of woods. The engine started and moved on, the vehicle has left the street, and they came out from the dustbin and looking at both ends of street. They smiled, but the tension has not yet eclipsed so they went carefully looking in all directions. Yousuf is smiling and is happy, he rejoices as he has been saved. The stranger said ‘why are you laughing as we are in a picnic’. Yousuf said; I am thankful to God that you are near to me more than anyone in this lonely and conceited place. The stranger smiled and told him to move on. They discovered a tea stall on the footpath that is not afraid of any tension and curfew but is worried about to make some bucks for his family. The tea staler finds his customers as someone in this vast city might be wondering and visits his stall. The stranger said to the Yousuf –‘do you have any money’,
The boy; said ‘yes’, but when he put his hand in pocket there is nothing except the dust and fade. Yousuf said to the stranger -‘I had lost all the money while running’. -‘How can you be so careless Yousuf, how will to go home now, you have fell in absolute trouble.
Yousuf said to him to provide money and he will give back after sometime. But the stranger said I don’t have money instead and I am also wonderer. Yousuf said him ‘Why you don’t have any money’, you are so big, why don't you have money, don't you work.
The stranger just smiled and said nothing. Yousuf; said; why don't we go to your home. The stranger said; ' I don't live here, I already said you I am also wonderer and seeked you as you where in trouble'.
Yousuf; said; then where do you live.
-‘you always follow me, who are you’.
He replied ‘I live in the streets and mountains and wonder here and there looking towards people who once staged us on their shoulders and now I find all of us in the mist and delusion of conceited greed of people and forgotten’. And the tea stall man speaks ‘do you have to drink tea or not’, Yousuf replies in hurry ‘yes, but I don't have money’.
The tea staler said then you must leave from here and don't waste my time.
The stranger said let's move on and check any other place. They stepped forward and from behind the tea staler shouts and called them back to take tea and give money some another day. They are pleased by his sympathy and said ‘a common man’s material belongs to whole community while rich man’s wealth belongs to only them’. They are taking the sips and make sound. The stranger is staring on him, Yousuf speaks –‘yes, where were we, tell me what connection you have with me’.
-‘you always remain aloof and wondering in thoughts of past, you must come out from them, otherwise they will haunt you for entire life’.
-‘but it isn’t my answer that I am seeking and expecting, I know you are something else, I think a ghost’.
Stranger smiles –‘a ghost, No, Not exactly’. Yousuf feels scared and in between they have finished the hot tea and granted tea staler salutations and blessings.
They are walking from one street to other in seek for refuge and they reached to ''Dasgeer-subh'' shrine which is in between the city and took some offerings and ''kahwa'' over there. The ‘Khatum’ started over there and people are gathering in rolls to listen the enchanting rhymes and salutations, they manage to find a place outside the complex. The melodious voices pampering hearts in shriven cold and misty place make them lost in the gardens, he is searching his beloved over there, the gardens are glooming with bliss, and he roams from one hill side to other and took the sip of water from the pond, looking at his own attire through the mirror of water he found they have become old and torn. His eyes are full, he is missing his family.
He is resting in peace and again he hears the cries and disturbed crowd running towards the shrine and along with them the teargases surround the peaceful environment and desolate his peace. They again had to run away from there and save themselves. The poisonous gas is too painful to bear. The eyes are chilled and lungs scratched by the fume and gas. Yousuf is displeased and tears are raining from his cracked cheeks which now bleed in shivering cold. He doesn’t understand why chaos is hailing, but a thought comes to his consciousness, that his mother guided him that towns and cities are crack-downed by the chaos. He hopes he leaves this mess as soon as possible and escape the wilderness of hegemony which has snatched tranquility from the hearts of people.
They have run quite far from the shrine and reached another isolated street. The snow also started and Yousuf is looking towards sky he raises his hand to feel the snowflake. He stopped and said the stranger that he cannot walk a single step now. They sat down below the shed near the swamp ''Baabdamb'' rubbing their hands and shivering body, the stranger in between told him how is your mommy and sister. He replied they are fine but Mooji will kill me now. Stranger laughed and said why she will kill you. He said I have breached her trust, I told her I will visit Anantnag and I came along with friends to Srinagar.
You must never disgrace and disrespect your parents, they are blessings from all mighty said the stranger. I don’t usually do any false activity but yesterday I did, I had lost in the illusion of compassion of deception replies Yousuf. Stranger said you will get home today or tomorrow and then seek for clemency. Snow is falling and rising and they can’t wait for more time as the shed will collapse by the over weight of snow.
They are yet under it and the snow also stopped, they are pleased and decided to move towards some other place where they could find food and shelter and will be far from every panic. Yousuf took some snow and forms it to snow ball and threw it towards stranger and started enjoying the snow. The stranger also threw the snow. They are enjoying the fabulous movements of blessings from the snowfall. Yousuf speaks snowfall is my favorite incident that gives me tranquility. It is so soft and patient and covers every roof and plot. Whatever comes before it; it never distinguishes between rich and poor, urban and rural. He also adds ‘it is the mercy from heavens to the dead and decaying world’. The stranger is staring on him and feels good that Yousuf is keen in analyzing world.
Playing and rejoicing they reached ‘Dargah’ which is the most famous mosque in the valley and holds the Relic of Prophet Muhammad (saw). They sat on across the bed of Dal-lake, throwing pebbles in lake, making jokes and saying tales. Yousuf wants to sail but what he all could do; he is at the mercy of time and situation. He wanted to sail on ''shikara'' but who is going to pay the fare. The stranger told him to sit here and he will come back after some time. He is waiting and watching the lake. It has been now afternoon and he has no chance to go home today. He is wondering how he will manage money so that he could pay fare and reach his home.
On other side Ruhi and his sister are waiting at the entrance of house. Zainab puts radio on and is listening news. Where the broadcast states Government have imposed Curfew at Srinagar and all the roads and services has been closed till further order. She hears this news and understood he won’t be able to come today also. She is worried where he would have slept over night and what he had eaten. Ruhi is also not taking any food since yesterday which had made her weak and sick. She pleads to yamin to get in market and get information from police station. He agreed and went towards market. Zainab has cooked food and brings to Ruhi, she doesn’t eat but Zainab insist her to take some. Yamin reached the market and approaches police station and says one of the police men about the report, he guides him to visit the ‘Munshi’ law office of station. He says ‘sir we had made report yesterday about the missing boy, has any information about him’. He replied ‘we don’t have only that work to look after everyone, he will come, and you must go home’. Yamin could not get sufficient answer and went back to village and informed Ruhi about the incident.
Ruhi is waiting and every moment is painful for her, she is overwhelmed by her anxiousness. She is afraid that she might lose his son as she lost his husband. The desperation has wretched her fate. Her body has become pale and grey. On looking to Ruhi; Zainab is depressing.
Yousuf is waiting at the Dal Lake and his mother and sister are waiting at their home all are desperate and shunned with the burden of despair. He is thinking about the incident and questions why he has felt in such circumstances as he never had any evil for others. But he also remembers Mullah of mosque (priest) who once said him a person who is beloved for Allah (swt) will be tested and the person must act in resilience and hold forbearance. All mighty can change the decree and holds the sovereignty over heavens and earth. This is inspiration which is keeping him upraised and hope to fight against all the problems and come out from them.
***
Shikara
(A small boat)
Shikara (A small boat)
Yousuf is sitting on the shore of lake and a boy came down the stairs, he is carrying big bags of vegetables on his head and flower basket hanging on his back. He pulled the boat and Sat on it. Yousuf called him and said –‘brother what’s your name,’ he replied ‘my name is Zahoor’. Yousuf pleaded to take him along the Dal-lake. Zahoor said he is going for work rather for any entertainment. Yousuf is curious to sail, he insisted him and stepped on the boat. Zahoor said get down from my boat; Yousuf is unwilling to get down. Zahoor says I will agree on the condition if you will assist me in selling the commodities as assistance. Yousuf is excited and agreed and steps in hurry. Zahoor says; Oh, slowly the boat is broken don't hasten. The boat is shaking and he sat down. Yousuf said him where are you going for: I am going to sell the vegetables and flowers to tourists in the houseboats.
Hearing these words are pleasant and admonishing for Yousuf, they pamper his vibes and raised his heart beat. The mesmerizing calm flow of water felt as his mother is holding him in her lap. The mist had covered the whole lake; it’s hard to view some yards far. The boat moves slowly in the silence and mist, he closes his eyes and feels his heartbeat. The boat stops, he glares and found frozen water. Zahoor is trying to pull the boat through the narrow pathway. A path has been made by Shikara boats men. The winter has frozen the lake and make difficult for boats men to sail. Zahoor is making his way by his muscle power; he is tired and can’t pull the boat. He stops between the lake and sees there are many yards to sail again before he reaches destination. Yousuf says; give me this long stick I will pull it forward. He is now making the boat move and sail slowly. They reached near the houseboats where tourist seems quite excited and ready for buying flowers, and vegetables. They get closer to houseboats and offer them at a good price. The foreigners are mostly interested in them rather than goods and take some vegetables, while the tourists from Ganges are attracted to flowers for making a good photo shoot. Yousuf has exposure with tourists at his locality but here he learnt and understood the dynamics of certainties, behaviour and approach with tourists.
Zahoor sold all his commodities and has collected hand sum money today, Yousuf found that his friend is earning quite well in his life. Zahoor; said while floating, you are lucky for me today I sold all the commodities otherwise from several days I had pending vegetables which would get ripen and I had to through them in garbage, but today I sold all. Yousuf on listening he is lucky he feels very happy and had never felt such that a stranger would praise him and mostly his presence. He had always been rejected from his childhood and outcaste, but today he is accepted. He stands and hugs Zahoor. Please be on your seat said Zahoor. Yousuf said him to sail quickly his friend at Dargah will be waiting for him. They both are enduring to sail and Zahoor said him; he has gone through very tough live and the tests and trials seems unending, and also says he had gone in a deep financial crunch, as being an orphan, he had no one to take care. He takes care of two younger brothers who are yet studying and he is working day and night to make two meals a day.
The story is a dragger for Yousuf and lies dumb to utter anything as he always complains about his living conditions, despite he was quite but he is encouraged and perceived by hard work of Zahoor despite he is caught in deep hardships of life, he feels Going gets easier when one urges . Yousuf felt his story relevant to him and acknowledges; all men face problems in their respective manner and all have to fight their own individual battles to make difference for themselves rather than people.
They finally reached the shore and he step down from the boat. Zahoor says ‘thank you yousuf for making my day awesome’. Yousuf replied not to mention, we are friends now and friends don’t say thanks to eachothers and this was really awsome for me. Zahoor smiles and hugs him, they now left each other. Yousuf is happy looking here and there seeking for the stranger, he waits for him over there and after a while, the stranger came; where were you Yousuf for so long, I was waiting and I thought you left the area, I was searching you since.
-‘I was with Zahoor who sells vegetables in his boat and I was with him on his boat, so it took me so long’ replied Yousuf.
-‘Did you enjoy the ride’ said stranger; ‘yes I did’ replied Yousuf. So let’s leave and move on said stranger.
They left back towards the shrine where they had taken kahwa and he said we will sleep tonight and take some food there. Who will give us food and shelter over their said Yousuf; the place is divine and we will find some subsistence there. They reached there and sat and are waiting with hunger and keeping his hand on tummy, he prays that; someone bring any food over there. Meanwhile their arrived a Mystic persons, who is saying many stories at same time, he made him confused what he is saying and which story he is resembling and regularly question him ''do you understand'', if he would say ''yes'' then the mystic would say explain and if he would say ''No'' then he scolded him why he can't understand. He is rubbing his head and wants to leave or the mystic to leave. He tries to stand up but the mystic catches his hand and says ‘behold child and do not bother what is coming, have faith and have patience, all will be right’. Yousuf understands the words of mystic are something which needs to be interpreted. He is thinking and waiting in the shrine, cold gets more bitter and they both are distressful.
Unfortunately, on this night, there was no food, they are extremely hungry and have not eaten anything from afternoon. Yousuf looks at stranger –‘I think we will have to sleep with empty stomach’.
-‘don’t worry, are you feels cold’.
-‘yes of course’.
-‘take this scarf’ he gives him scarf to roll over his neck. Yousuf rolls it over his neck so that cold doesn’t penetrate. –‘this is really different, I feels something different with your clothes, they have very warm sensation but it feels like nothing, are they costly fabric’.
-‘lol; no my dear it is normal but woven with love’.
-‘but I thinks I have seen this scarf before’.
Yousuf; stood up and is walking in the complex of Shrine looking at the big gate thinking about the scarf and hoping someone to come along with food to distribute. He found an apple lying in the corner below the tree. He picked and ate it and found the pouch in which there are thousands of rupees. He is excited and feels blessed to receive the incredible gift from the divine. He went to the ‘stranger’ and said him he has found money over there. –‘but it belongs to someone, we cannot take it’.
-‘why we need money and it is the gift for our trials and tribulations.
-‘no my dear you must deposit it with the custodian of shrine, that will be fine’.
Yousuf is confused and walks towards the custodian and meanwhile he saw a person with a bloomy face and is seeking something in the compound. He went to him and said, ‘uncle what are you looking for’. He said my pouch, I lost it somewhere over here.
Yousuf is very much nervous and doesn’t understand what he shall do now, to give him money or to leave, but hunger and cold are trembling his decision. He remembers his father’s sayings that a person shall always be right even the whole world is committing wrong and never hesitate to act for truth at any cost. The stranger has also said him the same thing, Yousuf is looking at the stranger and tears are rolling. He took the pouch out from his pocket and told that man –‘is this pouch, uncle’. He holds the pouch and replied ‘yes this is my pouch, where you found it’. He said ‘over there’, I was walking around. The person said ‘he is thankful for you and praises his generosity; from where you are. Yousuf replied and said him that he has lost in the city with empty pocket and want to go home back. The man was impressed by his generosity and been so good, but despite he counted the bucks and then he gave him 500 bucks from the same pouch.
Yousuf is so happy for receiving them and understood that the right conduct is always best and goodness makes its way forward. The person also offered him to visit their home and stay for the night. He said to him ‘uncle please wait for moment, he goes to the stranger and tells him that the man offered to visit his house. The stranger replied that you go there and I will be here waiting for you, I cannot go to anyone’s home and you must go. Yousuf is insisting but stranger ran from there. Yousuf is wondered why he reacted in such and why he didn’t come with him.
Yousuf came to that man and said ‘let’s go uncle and I am thankful’. The man puts his hand on his head and said don’t worry and took him to his home. He went there and is honoured with kind sympathy and awesome tasty food. He saw some pictures hanging on the guest room and he said what kind of pictures are they. He said they are calligraphy, what is written said Yousuf; he said it’s the name of prophet’s nephews. Yousuf remembers that in his village the elder ‘Sulee kak’ used to say him stories about the disappeared men’s in Srinagar which were killed by this specific community. He thought he has been trapped and will be killed now, his body is sweating. Yousuf speaks in low speech ‘uncle what is your school of thoughts being a Muslim’. He smiled and said you don’t need to know such things.
The man observed his distress and said him that don’t worry we won’t do anything; I know you might had heard some myths about us but we are humans and Muslims too and know the worth of life. I showed sympathy to you because you showed me your honesty and patient gratitude. If you don’t trust us, you can leave said the man. Yousuf said I don’t mean to hurt you.
-‘don’t worry go sleep’ replied the host. The host suggested him to take the bus from Dal-gate and travel for Anantnag rather than going for railway-station. They had a very beautiful conversation before he went to deep sleep. Yousuf told him about his family and the recent mishaps he had suffered. The man suggested him to be always truthful and work hard, one day you be a successful person. Yousuf thinks of his own he has committed a bad act by being rude to his host and being suspicious on him, he thinks the reality is completely different that what is been presented. He is pleased and slept in ease.
***
Ghare shu gasun
(Going home)
Ghare shu gasun (going home)
He woke up early today, but he is feeling dizzy and wants to sleep for more minutes but he also feels awkward to be late in someone’s house. He had bath with hot water and prayed his ‘fajr’ morning prayers and then he went into the kitchen of his host and forwarded praises and salutations to them and asked permission from his host to leave. They insisted him to take tea first and then leave towards home. He drank it swiftly and stood up and said ‘uncle now I shall go’. He came with him upto the bus stand and told the bus conductor to leave him on Dal-gate. He is finally happy and joyous that he will reach home today. But before he would leave he wants to meet the stranger and give him scarf, but he is nowhere and he step in the bus and is travelling towards Dal-gate. All the way along his eyes is seeking for the stranger, he regrets that he wasn’t able to know his name also, he thinks ‘how much stupid I am that I even didn’t know his name, all the way and nights he stood with me and I am so much rude, now only God knows when I will meet him again ever’. Between his thoughts he reached the station and stepped down from the bus and is searching for any service and he heard the voice calling the passengers to travel for Anantnag. He went towards the SUV’s stand.
He saw a white vehicle whose driver shouts loud to call passengers to travel for Anantnag, it is severe cold he feels the ice piercing frost in his feet, his hand and chicks are getting cold and becomes life less. He conversed with the driver and tried to negotiate the fare but the driver said the fares are general and not negotiable. He counts his money and said him can you also tell me how much I will be charged in Anantnag to travel for pahalgham. The driver said from here I will charge 100 bucks and from later they will also charge you same. He gets happy and he has good amount of bucks which will make him to cover this vast distance.
He boarded the SUV’s services and is waiting inside. He is looking across the road there are some girls taking pictures on the footbridge over there, and suddenly a girl felt into the lake. Girls are shouting for ‘help’. Yousuf came out rushing over there and is looking at her and people. It seems no one is going to save her even her friends so he held his bags to one of the girl and jumped into the lake. He holds her and took her to the side and saved her from drowning. People are taking clips and pictures while he is saving the girl. The people got a rope and Yousuf tied it to the girl and she was rescued while he is still in the lake. The cold water is making him unconscious but before he himself gets sink he holds the rope and come out from the lake.
He is been praised by the friends of the girl and people are hailing him. He took his bag from them and he is shivering by cold. The friends of that girl took her in their car, the crowd also seems dispersing and yousuf remians alone, he feels he will die now by cold frosts, he went to the Suv’s station but the driver told him that he is wet so he can’t allow him in his vehicle. He pleaded him but he replied ‘the other passengers won’t allow, so it will be better for you to dry up your clothes and who said you to be hero’. Yousuf remains silent and has no energy for any argument.
So he went from there and saw some persons quite far burning rags and wood pieces warming themselves. He went there and stands in front of fire to warm his body the other guys are staring him and one among speaks him ‘why are your clothes wet’. Yousuf said ‘I just jumped in lake’. One among laughed and replied ‘why have you lost your mind’. He replies ‘actually I saved a girl’. He thought they will praise me, but instead they scolded him. He is feeling nausea and vomiting as his body temperature is low and he stands before fire in chilling atmosphere. He waits over their till his clothes seems dry. After a while, he feels fit and went back to taxi stand. The clothes are wet yet but he manages.
He boarded the vehicle; he is waiting for other passengers so the vehicle gets full and only then the driver will travel. After an hour, it is full and the engine started. The driver is himself in hurry and he rushing with high accelerator and the traffic man whistled him, as he is crossing the ‘Chowk’ suddenly policemen came in front of the vehicle. He holds brake strongly and hardly managed to stop. It was convey of Governor approaching through the crossings towards his residence. The policemen were crumbled by the intrusion of the driver. When convey left, driver was taken out and bitten. His papers and license are confiscated. A man from the vehicle went to policeman to normalize the situation, but traffic police seems very angry, they are abusing him and the passenger took his phone and called someone, after a while the approach of passenger made the policeman to let the driver free but they warned him never to do such act again. Yousuf is terrified and thought that he has fallen to some other problem again. But the matter seemed to resolve. He took a breath of relief and the vehicle moved. The passengers approach was outstanding he thought he had some magical powers which convinced the police.
The driver is still in hurry and driving very fast. One of passenger said him to drive slowly and don’t risk our lives. Driver is silent and brought speed down. The passenger sitting beside Yousuf says him -‘why your clothes are wet, is everything normal’.
-‘Yes sir all fine, I just slipped in Dal-lake’. The vehicle is stopped at several check posts and at Pampore where saffron is grown. The police men stopped them and said all the passengers to come out and open their bags and show their respective I.D cards. Yousuf puts hand in his pocket but he has lost that also. They brought him down and said why you don’t have card with you; he said to them that he had lost it along with money. I had visited Srinagar for shopping, here are my clothes. They said why your clothes are so wet. He said he had to dive in the lake to save a person. They said –‘that seems great but you know the person who becomes hero, has always to pay price of other men’s sin’s’ and let him pass. Yousuf is thinking why everyone seems so much disgraced, no one seems to praise sacrifice, all are lost in the mist of rush and defy the convections of tranquility.
He thinks no matter what people think he can’t change himself, now he is free and rejoicing while travelling. The passenger beside him said why you fib me that you slipped while you jumped to save some one’s life and said don’t be hero and risk yourself for others who will for-grant everything. Yousuf remained silent and didn’t answer anything. He is rubbing his hand and behind him a passenger gave him his ‘Kangri’ a fire pot to warm. He feels quite rehabilitated by the fire. He has reached finally to Anantnag town and he gave driver his fare, the money was also wet. The driver said ‘what is this, dry them first’. Yousuf kept them for a minute on the handle of Kangri and dried them; he returned Kangri to the passenger and paid his fare also. He is walking towards the same place when they had reached Anantnag for the first time. He is reading the name plates on the buses and saw a big bus with name plate Pahalgham. The name plate of his region gave him sense of relief as deserter feels on discovering oasis.
He is moving towards the bus and in between some boys on scooters came to him and asked his place of residence, he replied I live in pahalgham. They said that is goodness for us and disaster for you. You nomads, you thrashed our guy at village, now we will show you, who we are and from where you belong. They caught him by his neck and started beating him. He got several injuries and they threw his clothes from his bag on the road. The vehicles moving trampled them. He is crying but is too sick to defend himself. Suddenly the local shopkeepers approached and saved him and slapped some of goons. They ran on their scooter and bikes. Yousuf is lying down and crawling, he collected his clothes which he bought for her mother and sister. He screams loud.
He has fallen due to assault and wet clothes and he is continuously coughing, an innocent boy in the cradle of self-interested people. He boarded the mini Bus and is travelling and in between the vehicle has been stopped by police, looking for someone. Yousuf is laying his head on the mirror and keeping his eyes closed. They saw him and took him with themselves. He is been under custody of police.
-‘Why are you taking me sir’ said Yousuf? Police men slapped him and said be quite. He doesn’t understand what has happened and what is the matter behind his arrest. They took him to police station and started interrogating him as he has been charged to have joined the rebellion and he was missing from several days. The police men said ‘we were searching for you throughout the route of Srinagar-Anantnag but you escaped decisively’. He is hanged to know that statement and he says to himself now you are in a real pit of hell, where I can’t come out. He leaves his breath and surrenders before the grave situation. He has no words to justify before them. They don’t spare any moment for him and says let our officer come, he will listen your statement and decide your fate.
He is sitting in the dark cell under grief and sickness, the other convicts their call him and speaks; under which charge you are here.
-‘I don’t know I was travelling for home and they arrested me’ said Yousuf.
Another convict says are you caught for peddling drugs.
-‘no, I am not caught on that but on being a rebel’. The convicts are terrified to see him and said –‘we are sorry’ and remained silent. One police man brought him out from the cell and said him the report has been made from your own village. Yousuf is staring the police men and the door opens, the inspector approached him and looking at him says him ‘are you coming from Srinagar’. He replied with low pitch and trembling body -‘yes sir’.
-‘why are you shivering’ replies inspector in amaze.
The inspector gets in his cabin and orders his escort to bring him inside my cabin. He is scrolling the messenger app keeping legs on table, where he saw the viral video of girl drowning and been rescued by a boy. He sees the girl which is her daughter; he calls her; phone is ringing and he calls her again till she receives the call –‘are you fine sweet heart, what happened’.
She says we were taking pictures and I slipped and fell in the lake and a brave guy saved me. He is watching the video and sees he is the same guy who saved his daughter. Till this time Yousuf was crushed under boots and could only murmur. He took him up and said -‘don’t worry we are inquiring only’ and said to his juniors to leave him’.
He is amazed how it is possible, the inspector said him –‘I own debt to you; you have saved my daughter’s life at Srinagar’. ‘So I will leave you as you have been trapped by someone’s report who might be your enemy’. The inspector also says him ‘when we brought you here you were already beaten who did that’, he replies ‘sir, some goons at Anantnag town thrashed me unnecessarily.
-‘For what reason’ said the inspector; -‘I am unaware, they asked my place of residence and when I told them I am from pahalgham they beat me indiscriminately. Leaving me injured and crunched’.
Yousuf is in serious condition and can’t go his home alone. He is wondering who can be that person who brought him to edge of death. The khan came inside the police station with raised mustaches and approached to inspector. Where is that notorious? Yousuf looks towards him and understands that it is non another than khan Sabh who conspired against him. Khan is smiling with wide open eyes and tells him –‘now you will realize with whom you have messed up, you little guy’. Yousuf smiled at him and Khan feels disgraced and replies ‘laugh laugh for last time and you will end up in dark and wretched chambers of prison or they will someday fire you and laughed loud’.
Yousuf smiled and replied that I am free. Khan said how and who will set you free you creep, the inspector said it’s me. Khan was looking like an owl; the inspector said Yousuf this guy is your enemy who reported falsely against you. Khan becomes dumb and doesn’t respond and instead he left the police station and Yousuf is sitting and pampering his injuries. The khan reached pahalgham and is anguished and murmuring evil words against inspector. His son told him what happen, he said Yousuf is relieved and is in the police station. One of the village men who is working with Khan hears these words, he gets information regarding Yousuf and he seeks a moment to escape and rush towards his village and inform Ruhi.
Ruhi and Zainab have got dried with anxiety and cold, they are statues since Yousuf is missing. The man reached their and went straight to Ruhi and said what he listen from the Khan. She gets happy and rushes with Zainab to the police station. Meanwhile the inspector has called the police station of Anantnag to arrest the guys who have beaten a guy today. They have arrested them and brought to police station where Yousuf is waiting. They have caught many guys and hold Yousuf to identify the goons he pointed on some guys which were apprehended. After brief interrogation they revealed the cause and the inspector calls the pahalgham police station to arrest Raju and his gangsters. Ruhi is travelling and she saw the police have arrested Raju and she does not care about him and says with herself ‘it’s good for them’.
Till Ruhi reached the police station the police have held all the culprits in cell. Zainab sees through the cell and found Aquib over there, she called him said –‘what are you doing here’, he said ‘police has caught me for beating a local pahalgham boy’. She replies in anger–‘that boy is my brother’. Aquib is staged and silent, Zainab cries their and says –‘Go to hell’ and left. Ruhi is seeking Yousuf and saw him sick and injured she took him and left the police station. She took him to a nearest chemist and made his dressings and left towards their home.
In police station the parents of Anantnag boys have assembled and also of pahalgham. They have started to fight each other’s and the inspector could hardly mitigate the matter. Inspector is seeking for Yousuf and the attendant said -‘sir he has left with his mother some time before’. All these goons and their parents managed to contact several authorities and ministers to set their children out. Whatever be the situation brings bounty to cops. The parents of some boys who were not able to pay the ransom, where charged with the burglary.
Yousuf is trembling and shivering, his mother is crying for his situation. They reached pahalgham and have to travel more, they had crunched lives but have kindling patience to walk more miles to reach home. The mountain seems stretching and rising more than ever. Yousuf is coughing badly but is happy to reach his destination and meet his family again. They finally reached home and whole village was waiting for them. Their premises is overcrowded and laid Yousuf on his mattress.
Yousuf closes his eyes and the whole world seems in front of him he is glimpsing every incident which he faced, he gets anxious but he remembers the people who hold him throughout his sufferings and let him survive from the cold and wilderness of human hegemony. He is in relentless position his body is cramped and paining, he opens his eyes and found his mother before him. He points towards bag and his mother brought it near and opens the bag; they took the pheran out from the bag. Ruhi is heart crushingly weeping; the tears of joy flourished her dearth face. The mother got his child and happiness back.
Yousuf tells his mother where is yamin, she replied he is in his home. He speaks ‘why he didn’t visit me then’. Yamin’s father replies ‘my child, he is feeling guilty to leave you in wildernesses. Yousuf replies ‘uncle can you please call him, it’s all okay and he is my best friend after all and I understand’. Yamin’s father goes to his house to call him. Yamin came inside and Yousuf is pleased to see him, yamin hugs him and cries indiscriminately and speaks ‘I am sorry my bro, we should not had left you behind’. Yousuf replies ‘leave it, these days where awful and awesome’.
Ruhi came to him with amazed eyes she picks the red scarf in hands and is glaring it, her eyes are full and she speaks –‘from where you got this’.
-‘oh this is my friend’s he left it with me yesterday at Srinagar shrine’.
-‘but this belongs to Rashid your father’.
-‘what’ replies Yousuf and Zainab at same time.
-‘but how can it be’ says Ruhi.
Yousuf is wondering in thoughts and trying to compare the ghost with his father but he felt he was not his father.
Yousuf tells his family the tales of city how he was roaming from street to street confronting trials and tribulations and in between he had a friend the Ghost who holds him throughout the wilderness. Ruhi is missing her husband badly she checks continuously the scarf she recognizes it ‘it is of Rashid and he was wearing it when he was taken by the dark forces’.
Yamin stays with him for several days till he recovers from the sickness and injuries and on following day the snow falls. Yousuf is happy and rushes out, his mother is glaring him and happy to see him rejoicing again. Yousuf and yamin are playing with snow and they decided to rebuild Snowman. They are collecting snow in buckets and building it and after hours they are tired and their hands are blazing with snow. They are laughing and Yousuf eyes become wet he recoils all his memories associated with snow whether it be his father’s memoir, yamin’s friendship, Raju’s rage, horror of ghost and Ghost’s pamper.
He feels someone is glaring him through the woods; he moves forward and shadow seem fleeing. He rushes towards it and ultimately reached far in wilderness and the Ghost visited him from his behind. Yousuf looks towards him it is the stranger. Yousuf smiles and hugs him.
-‘Yousuf how are you now’.
-‘I was waiting for you and I am fine’.
-‘I am very happy you reached your home safe’.
-‘tell me now who are you’ says Yousuf.
-‘I am’.
-‘what are you’.
-‘I said I am’.
-‘did you mean you a ghost’.
He smiles and rubs his head –‘he lifts the hood from his face and his face is reshaping’.
-‘oh my God, no it can’t be’.
-‘I was always there for you whenever you went to search for me; I came to visit you from the cloak’.
-‘Abu why you didn’t come to home, mom and Zainab is missing you they will be pleased to see you’.
-‘no Yousuf I cannot go there and promise me you won’t tell them about me’.
-‘but why’.
-‘because I am dead for the world and I cannot meet them’.
-‘then why you came to me’ replies Yousuf with tears in his eyes and happiness on his face.
-‘because you were not moving, you have stagnated your world around me and from your childhood till your teenage you still wonder for the ghost in wilderness’. ‘You have to move on and look and see how the world is spread vast’.
Yousuf is shivering and speaks in tremble ‘Abu I don’t want to lose you again, please be with me please’.
-‘Yousuf my kid please go home’. He disappears in woods leaving Yousuf their alone. He moves towards his home crying. He rushes to his mother and hugs her tight. She speaks ‘leave me’. Yousuf looks on his mother and speaks ‘mom Abu came to me, he was non another then him’.
-‘what are you saying’, replies her mother in marvel.
Yousuf speaks ‘yes his words and his teaching where always with me, which kept me strong through the cold and wretched wildernesses. She smiles and kisses his forehead’.
The night is about to approach and they are also about to accomplish the chore and build a gigantic snowman and a snowball hit his head, he looks and found Zooni behind him. The moon of his dark night has enshrined his gloomy world in the snow capped mountains and Yousuf is gazing her besides his snowman which they created in cold waves and with cramped bodies knowing it will melt soon. He wraps himself under cloak and goes deep into his heart, searching for tranquility and peace.
***
***The End***
NOTE FROM AUTHOR
‘I am thankful to all the readers of my book who hold their patience while reading and accepting my endurance of writing. For me writing is not just a skill but an art which must touch the vibes of emotions and feelings of an individual. While writing I have tried my best to forge the facts and situation in the play and plot. I have been eager to write since my childhood but due to lack of opportunities and stage it deferred for years. The most beneficent privilege of modern Globalisation is it made all things possible at finger tips and enhanced the skill and talent of individual’s. But other problems of this Globalised world is it syncronised the world’s talent with some handful of corporations only. I hope that as a reader you had enjoyed the story and cumulated all its characters and ascertained It’s moral and virtue’.
_Athar Mudasir_
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